Tobi Hill-Meyer admits: he authored controversial anti-lesbian memes
June 19, 2012
It’s hard to be controversial on a website whose sole purpose is portraying lesbians and feminists as the giant insects one must shoot to advance in the FallOut video game franchise. But someone on “RadFemScorpions” managed to post a meme so anti-gay, so “corrective-rapey”, so “cotton-ceilingy” that even people who applaud the verminizing of lesbians and feminists as their reason du jour were offended. The meme was ultimately scrubbed from the site after comments from site-supporters like the one below:
Now, heterosexual male pornographer and transgender pretendbian Tobi Hill-Meyer, who calls himself a “butch dyke” and holds benefits for anti-female sympathizers to support his campaign against the rights of females to gather among themselves, has admitted that he is the author of the censored meme.
Here is his statement yesterday defending his actions:
“A while ago I put together one of those memes for RadFem Scorpion. With two sentences and an implied connection between them, it’s hard to make it misinterpretation-proof and with all the radfem harassment of trans women I took the easy route and posted it anonymously. But other folks were misinterpreting it too, so I wanted to discuss it here and provide some context.
The concern raised is that this is the same logic that men use to convince lesbians to have sex with them, as in, if you like dildos, you should have sex with me – it’s often put in that context “how about a real cock.” Of course, it’s hard to speak about sexuality as a trans woman in this specific moment in internet history without the aura of “trans women are trying to force lesbians to have sex with them” being at least an undercurrent of thought.
These memes usually go with a common statement in the first sentence and conflicting or contradictory information in the second which points out the hypocrisy within the prejudiced idea presented. In this case, the prejudiced idea is that having or liking a “penis” invalidates lesbianhood. My message is strongly condemning the invalidation of lesbian identity and use of pressure and control around disapproved of relationships to genitals. Note that the action point is to stop attacking/invalidating trans women and our partners. I know folks are sensitive to this issue, but it should be apparent that arguing *against* condemnation of one set of experiences is totally different from arguing *for* condemnation of all other experiences.
Cis women who have trans women partners (and trans women as a whole) are told that we can’t be actual lesbians. I am condemning that invalidation and contrasting it with high popularity of dildos even in strong holdouts of radfem transmisogyny. The conclusion is that lesbians who have sex involving a dildo (sometimes called a phallus) are hypocritical to attack and invalidate lesbians who have sex involving a trans-clit (sometimes called a phallus).
So why do I argue this is hypocritical? Some have suggested that I am arguing there is no difference between having sex involving a dildo and having sex involving a trans clit. That is ridiculous and they are entirely different. For one thing, dildos are always hard. That’s not the case for trans clits, many of which operate best when soft. So when several responders said “but a dildo isn’t a real penis,” my response is, “neither is a trans woman’s genitals, yet radfems refuse to make the distinction in either case”
There is also further historical context that is really important to understand here. The idea that all phalluses are the same is not something I created or advocate – it was a radfem invention. Shelia Jeffreys said of dildos “like the penis, they symbolize male power and the ability to violate women.” The conceptualization that condemned heterosexual penis-in-vagina sex as inherently patriarchal made no exceptions for dildo-in-vagina sex, going so far as to try to make dildos illegal in some instances. In Dworkin and MacKinnon’s anti-pornography work, they included women being penetrated by inanimate objects as one of the criteria that would make erotic material “pornographic” and thus illegal under their proposed law. Sara Smith wrote about this issue of radfem hate for dildo-using women in her essay A Cock of One’s Own, “All women–lesbian, bisexual, heterosexual, and solo-sexual—are denounced as traitors if their desires include penetration.”
Mich Fest itself has a long history of condemning the “wrong” kind of woman as not really being a woman. Right now it’s trans women, but there had previously been just as strong a prejudicial sentiment for leather women, and just a decade or two ago there was strong condemnation of dildo-using women and debates were had around whether or not dildos should be allowed on the land. Tribe 8 was famously protested at Mich Fest because of their inclusion of dildos in their performance. I interviewed one well known dildo vendor at Mich Fest who said that the first year they went to Mich Fest they sold a few dildos out of their backpack and had a steady stream of women surreptitiously asking for them as if they were an illicit material.
So while radfems are currently much more pre-occupied with policing the sexual behavior of trans women and our partners, let’s not forget that many of them would just as strongly condemn dildo-using lesbians. The argument that liking penis means you are not a lesbian did not originate to condemn cis lesbians in relationships with trans women, that is only its current incarnation. The hypocrisy I aim to highlight is when those who were once subjected to this very same argument then turn around and use it against us.”
[Sic. Bolding by him. –GM]
It’s interesting that Tobi/Toby/Tobias who was raised by lesbian parents has recently taken to calling himself “female” even though as he explains to his mother here, he would prefer to be addressed with the pronoun “Z” to denote his speshul snowflake genderqueerness, but no one will go along with it so he chooses “she” as a default.
Tobi/Toby/Tobias, who has banked his laydee-sperm from his trans-ovaries for future use impregnating the type of female who is non-sperm-producing, knew he wished he could be a “lesbian” long before he decided to be trans.
What oh what is a hetero male who fetishizes lesbians to do but call himself a transbian and bully his way into lesbian spaces and communities??? And “correct” lesbians who claim female homosexuality exists? Instruct the laydees that his peen is a female peen??? Tell the lesbians they are “discriminating” against his dick???
Yes. All of the above.