June 22, 2013
TRANSform me is a “reality show”. The premise? “Premise: A female contestant is given an internal and external makeover by a team of three transgender women stylists.”
Guest Post by Moira:
|A hipster girl from Brooklyn, Phaea, is about to get engaged. She’s having a party in a few days and feeling insecure because she doesn’t know how to have the kind of style she wants. Her mom was a hippie and never taught her to do makeup or do her hair or wear heels. She sent in a plea for a makeover to this show.
Play by play:
1.52 The transwomen arrive. Laverne grabs Phaea’s loose t-shirt. “Is this what you always wear”” Phaea says it’s a typical hanging around the house outfit. Laverne asks Phaea’s boyfriend Justin if this outfit turns him on. Not really, he says.
2.00 Laverne says that as transgender women they are uniquely qualified to “take the woman inside and bring her out.” Confusing being a woman with aesthetic choices? Charming, already.
3.15 Phaea: “I can’t imagine walking around in high heels.” Laverne, “Why can’t you?” She sounds sharp, almost offended. She thinks this is a requirement, non-negotiable.
3.38 Back at the apartment the backup trans women are going through Phaea’s things; one is tossing clothes out of her closet. Jeans and t-shirts, and “grandma sweaters” are heaped on the floor. “Boy stuff? Eww!” she says. What if someone had done the same to her closet, pre-transition, I wonder. How would she have felt if someone took her “girl stuff” and said “Eww!” and tossed it out?
3.55 “All that’s gotta go. Not in a female closet! Especially not in a female living in the 21st century.” My irony-meter just short circuited. The trans woman stomps on the offending clothes with her high heels on.
4.23 Laverne asks Phaea if she feels sexy. She says no; she says she has a friend who says boys love her underwear. Phaea says she asked Justin if he even noticed her underwear; he said he didn’t, then paused and said, “but you don’t have really great underwear.” Phaea says, “Oh god! I felt like such a failure.” Yes. A failure to have every minute aspect of your life dictated by a fetishized, porn-informed male gaze. What is the primary function of underwear? Is it to excite men? Is it to keep your tender bits clean and away from friction? Sorry, I was confused for a minute.
4.34 Redheaded trans woman asks Justin if Phaea ever “sexes it up for him” in “a sexy little, you know…do a little…” and she does a stripper move. No, says Justin. The trans women act outraged and then go through Phaea’s underwear, mocking it for not being lingerie.
6.00 They take off in an ambulance because apparently this is a fashion (or cultural?) emergency. A woman is about to get married to a man and she doesn’t own lingerie or strip for him! THE HORROR!
6.16 At a boutique, they measure Phaea’s bust. One trans woman says, “Look at you! This is what I wished for when I was born!” Because having boobs means wearing ridiculous clothes. Didn’t you know? And because this trans woman is jealous of your body, you have to objectify it the way she would do. Because you owe it to her. Because it’s more hers than yours. Because she would use it “correctly.”
6.36 One of the backup trans women: “I changed myself from this wimpy, introverted boy to this, like, hot sexy luscious mama. And if I can make myself look like this, I am sure I can make a ton of women–a TON of women–look like the women they should be.” The women they SHOULD BE? Really? Do tell. How very transgressive.
7.24 More of the measuring. “Boobie time! 35 and a half–perfect. Let’s see if you have man shoulders or not.” She doesn’t. They measure her hips too. “36 and a half. Look at you!” Approval. Sure. What’s the song? 36, 24, 36. They admonish her–”This is what I wished for when I was born and you’re just hiding yours! You’re not showing it–you gotta work it!” Because being born female means you gotta “show it.” It’s. Not. For. Men. This is so crazy. These are probably homosexual transwomen, who should have no dog in this fight–why does it matter to them if a woman conforms to the straight male gaze? Oh. Because in some way they still understand her body as belonging more to them than to herself.
Phaea tries on some clothes. She tries a blouse and skirt that she says she loves–she feels good in it. But one of the trans women doesn’t love it so she starts over.
8.31 Phaea tries on a flowy bronze dress–she says it makes her feel really, really good about her body and she feels very comfortable in it, whereupon the Laverne rejects it because it can’t be worn with a bra. Not painful enough!
9.32 Phaea tries on heels. She totters. They stop her and tell her she walks like a dude.
10.04 Backup trans woman Nina: “What dude looks sexy in heels? Except…” jazz hands at self..”Well, I wouldn’t call myself a dude, but…you know…” Yes, yes I do.
10.18 They teach her a “feminine” walk. She falls, gasps, “It hurts so much!” Redheaded backup trans woman Jamie snottily remarks that *she* never had so much trouble learning to walk in heels. They tell her she has to walk with a beat in her head, and shake her ass and hips. Turns out that walking is another one of those daily activities, like wearing underwear, which must now be undertaken with men in mind. So silly! I thought it was for physical mobility.
11.08 Laverne tears up thinking about Phaea wearing heels to her engagement party.
12.34 Phaea says she feels sexy when she’s with her boyfriend because of the way he looks at her and treats her, but on her own, she doesn’t feel “sexy.” The transwoman tells her that she needs to stop relying on her boyfriend for that feeling and it should come from within; that they’re going to do a burlesque photo shoot to “empower” her. Phaea starts crying and says she feels terrified and doesn’t even know why. Pressed, she says she is afraid she will look stupid.
There’s a lot going on here. First of all, Phaea, like every other female, has been indoctrinated from birth into compulsory heterosexuality and told that “her” sexuality doesn’t exist outside of the need to please men and be fodder for the male gaze. But apparently her mom tried to counteract this somewhat in her upbringing. So she has what’s arguably a healthier relationship to herself as a sexual being. She only notices feeling “sexy” when being intimate with her lover. She apparently doesn’t live in a constant state of sexualizing her body, but experiences herself as being sexually attractive pretty much just within the purview of times when she is actually being intimate. However, women in Phaea’s culture who don’t live in a constant state of hypersexualizing themselves are made to feel that they are failing at being “women.” That there is something wrong with them. Because they’re succeeding at being human, and indeed this puts them outside of the mainstream to a large and potentially alienating degree.
The stated goal–to make Phaea “feel sexy” all the time–is the wrong goal. Perhaps this is a source of Phaea’s terror; she feels she may be on the precipice of losing important ground. Perhaps she senses it will be dehumanizing.
Also, we have to consider why the scripted formula for what is supposed to make us “feel sexy,” looks curiously identical to a porn-inflected, fetishizing male gaze. Lingerie is someone’s idea of sexy, but certainly not everyone’s. What is Phaea’s idea of sexy? She’s trying to understand, but she’s being shut down–and perhaps this is also a source of Phaea’s terror. Instead of exploring her own erotics, she’s being told what they should be. She’s being told by someone who stands in as a transgressive figure–someone who is outside of traditional sex/gender roles–so perhaps she believed that this person might be open, experimental, and exploratory in their approach. Instead, the “transgressive” figure reinforces the stereotypical “sexy” template in the most unequivocal manner possible.
13:27 YES!! Signs of life from Phaea!! She’s in garters and fishnets but she’s shut herself in a bathroom. When they come to “check on her” she says this doesn’t feel how she wanted it to, how she imagined it would. Laverne snickers at her and tells her that a lot of people find garters and fishnets sexy–essentially, implying something is wrong with her if she doesn’t. But Phaea says something like, “It would be nice to feel *actually* sexy and not sort of fake, play sexy.” (!!!) How difficult it must have been for her to halt this production and speak this truth. And of course, a trans person should be the first to understand when the culturally-defined markers for her gender just aren’t what feels right for her–right? NO! ARGH! The trans woman gives her some incomprehensible speech about how when she transitioned she was expressing on the outside what she always felt on the inside. She gestures at the garters and says that Phaea’s body is just a shell–that she has to connect with herself on the inside first. What?! She has to internalize this image of herself as some tarted up porn star before it will “feel sexy” to her? Maybe Phaea can tell the trans woman that she needed to wear the butchest clothes she could until she really felt sexy as a man *inside* and see how she likes it. But no, the red-eyed-from-crying Phaea (surrounded by the trans women and the camera crews and whatever other reality show offstage people) lets herself be led to the boudoir for a photo shoot instead. With a male photographer of course. I might lose my lunch.
Phaea puts a game face on, complies, smiles and poses, making “sultry” faces–but you can see it’s put on. What speech did she get offscreen about holding up production? Who knows. Laverne and her backups practice lots of operant conditioning, encouraging her to ham it up by clapping and cheering. Is the the “actually sexy” feeling Phaea had hoped for? Does that feeling come from being (un)dressed like this and looked at by near-strangers and photographed? She keeps saying no–and they keep not listening. So she “lays back and tries to enjoy it?”
15:40 or thereabouts. Phaea’s going for a haircut. Much less loaded. Still, the disconnect is palpable. Phaea says how she loves her hair, but her hair is so thick she never know what to do with it and feels like a Ramone. Jamie explains to her that her problem was her hair being layered so that it was too *thin* and there was “basically nothing there.” It’s *almost* like they have to contradict, disorient and destroy her entire self-concept and install themselves as the arbiters of her reality instead.
20.18 Laverne: “The most important thing is that she continues to remember that she deserves it.” Oh yeah. I’m sure our culture will never let her forget that this is what she “deserves.”
Watch the horror here: http://www.vh1.com/video/transform-me/full-episodes/phaea-episode-8/1638069/playlist.jhtm
[photos and captions added by me-GM]
May 29, 2013
December 23, 2012
New docudrama of the Angelo Heddington case. Graphic.
November 7, 2012
An excerpt from Christine Benvenuto’s forthcoming memoir on the experience of surviving a genderist spouse was published in TheGuardian this week. “Sex Changes: A Memoir Of Marriage, Gender And Moving On” will be published November 13 by St Martin’s Press. Recommended by “My Husband Betty” blogger Helen Boyd.
Her middle-aged autogynephillic husband of twenty years and father to three children is consumed with his male-privileged gender fantasies of what it means to be female and Christie records the results. Some quotes:
“Yet Tom was interested in my relationships with other women. Too interested. Whenever I began a friendship, he would edge suffocatingly close. One time he called a new friend in secret to ask for babysitter recommendations so he could take me out for my birthday. After that, he often found some pretext – it always felt like a pretext – of doing something nice, and got his hands on a friend’s phone number, calling for advice or information and asking her for secrecy. It felt creepy every time.”
“From his cheerleaders I learned that in the new political correctness, female solidarity is out. A man in a dress is in. Among women who consider themselves feminists, a man who declares himself a transsexual trumps another woman any day. One of Tom’s supporters would eventually sum up this perspective most explicitly: “He’s a transsexual. Anything he does is what he needs to do.”
These career women told Tom, and some would later tell me, that my wifely role was to support my man and to get my children on board with the project. My responsibility was to Tom. Tom’s responsibility was to Tom. In the Valley of the Politically Correct, being a transsexual means never having to say you’re sorry.”
“It is inescapable: for me there is something slightly creepy and more than slightly sad about a man in women’s clothes. Male legs in sheer stockings. The sight of Tom in an exact replica of a skirt that was once my favourite. It is creepy for one woman to copycat another, the stuff of thrillers. Creepier for a man to do the same. Creepier still if that man is your husband.
Looking back, I can say Tom was a wonderful husband, father, friend. Or I can say Tom was a fabrication. A fake, who didn’t want to be with me, he wanted to be me.”
Read more here:
ETA: This is “Tom”: http://www.metroweekly.com/arts_entertainment/events/?ak=7811
October 12, 2012
Panicked by rumors that Adrian Chen of Gawker is about to run an article identifying him, notorious Reddit pedophile Violentacrez (whose activities are documented HERE ) has deleted his Reddit account and gone into hiding.
Things started getting a bit uncomfortable for Violentacrez when a group of enterprising women decided it was time to organize and take action against the Reddit site “Creepshots”, which is where men post compromising photos of women taken without their knowledge or consent as a sort of sadistic photographic sexualized group internet assault. Like Violentacrez’s r/Jailbait, which had an policy banning any user which posted a legal photo or a photo of any female over eighteen, Creepshots policy was that all photos must be taken unwillingly, without the consent and participation of the women being targeted.
Women said “enough is enough” and decided to fight back, and began documenting the identities of the participating men and reporting them to law enforcement. One man – a teacher who posted stalkery sexualized photos of his female students- was investigated and fired. A site called “Predditors” http://predditors.tumblr.com/ was started to shed light on the men involved: a site where women can post photos and public information identifying these perpetrators.
Yesterday The Creepshots site was taken down after a woman apparently tracked down the site moderator “CreeperComforts” and threatened to expose him http://i.imgur.com/AL52y.png . A replacement site “CreepSquad” has already been started. Gawker writer Adrian Chen, who has covered pedophile Violentacrez ‘s activities before, apparently followed these events closely and wisely decided it might be a good time to do a follow up story on Reddit’s chief child pornographer. He apparently contacted several sources at Reddit which caused Violentacrez, who must see the way the wind is blowing, to delete his account and flee after years of sexually exploiting underage children. Unsubstantiated rumor is that Chen is planning to run a gawker piece which discusses Violentacrez ‘s real-life identity.
Chen isn’t yet talking. But in the ensuing shitstorm (of Reddit men angered at their predatory porn being under attack and raging at their child porn and creep porn being taken away) several events have occurred. In the last 24 hours:
Reddit moderators have joined together to ban all Gawker links from Reddit in protest.
Gawker’s Adrian Chen responded by vowing to ban all Reddit links, and all use of Gawker materials including links, from Reddit.
The men have successfully had the Predditors site removed from Tumblr.
Tumblr has REINSTATED the Predditors site.
Sites like GenderTrender who have previously covered the malefeasance of pedophile Violentacrez are being inundated by nasty creeps “typing with one hand”.
In celebration of Violentacrez’ s removal from Reddit, and in response to the creepy porn-sick pedophile skum that is sending GenderTrender nasty-ass comments based on my previous campaign against Violentacrez, I present a GenderTrender exclusive: The only known public photos of child pornographer Violentacrez. These were taken at a Dallas Reddit Meetup. Enjoy Boys!
Katie J. M. Baker at Jezebel http://jezebel.com/creepshots/
Rebecca Greenfield at The Atlantic Wire http://www.theatlanticwire.com/technology/2012/10/redditors-stand-gawker-protect-child-pornography/57850/
are all providing excellent reportage of the emergent events.
September 13, 2012
August 23, 2012
February 28, 2012
FEMALE COMMENTS ONLY TO THIS POST.
POST UPDATED 02/29/2012 :
February 1, 2012
Someone dropped me a line about a show they saw on the National Geographic Channel this week called “Taboo: Secret Lives”. I’ve never seen the show, but apparently they featured a woman who “had a secret”, and the secret was that she was a fake paraplegic. That’s right! The woman went around in a wheelchair pretending to have a spinal injury- fooling everyone. The woman who contacted me just couldn’t believe that a female would do such a thing. She was certain that the woman (although they never mentioned it on the show) must be a male transgender. And she was right. Read the rest of this entry »
January 2, 2012
December 15, 2011
This is a follow up to this post about a 14 year old boy on puberty suppressing medications named Nicole who was featured in a Boston Globe article a few days ago.
One of the saddest aspects of the whole trans kids phenomena is the way the kids are fetishized by transgenders and pedophiles alike. Not that the two categories are always separate. From the men who sexually fetishize the pubescent-boy look of young F2Ts to the men who sexualize young boys like Nicole in a predatory, pedophilic way. As we can see by the screen caps below, in the few days since the publication of the Boston Globe article, Nicole is already being targeted by pedophiles on reddit.
Nicole isn’t alone. Reddit is a cesspool of sexualized child exploitation, mostly- but not always- of minor females.
In Nicole’s case, the male transgender that originated the below posts is a well-known moderator at reddit that calls himself “violentacrez”. He claims he is a 50 year old IT professional, beta tester and self described “hacker” living in the Dallas area who posts from his work computer and once “had sex” with his 19 year old stepdaughter, and gave his son a box of pornographic magazines when he was six years old (which the son confirms). He describes his Gender Identity” as:
“Cisgendered male, wish I was a girl, attracted to girls, but a bottom who likes cock.” He elaborates: “I have grown awfully fond of my penis, and my prostate brings me multiple orgasms, but I also want to be smooth and pretty and have breasts and a vagina and bear children.” [sic]
The activities of Violentacrez, who has ties to graphic artist Felix LaFlamme, was featured in a September Anderson Cooper CNN segment on child predators after being tracked by Gawker blogger Adrian Chen for months.
Violentacrez started a section on reddit called “Jailbait” where he uploaded photos of female children that he collected from teenage social networking sites- photos where the girls were wearing bathing suits or playing dress-up (or just posing with Mickey Mouse at Disney world) in ways that he and other pedophiles find erotic. He then captioned them with sexualized commentary. The site header read ““Keep a teen off the streets — put her in your van!”
Violentacrez also started a reddit site called /r/picsofdeadchildren where necrophilic pedophiles can view and upload – what else? Pictures of dead children, as well as a site called “LittleGirlsDancingLikeWhores”. In October of this year his “Jailbait” site was shut down for posting photos of a 14 year old performing oral sex on a male.
The other sites remain, and the jailbait site has since been replaced by the following:
Looking for jailbait? Try one of these fine reddits:
0.Pro Teen Models
0.The New Jailbait
0.Gay Teen Pics
0.Male Jailbait Archives ** Private, by invitation only**
You can verify it for yourself by clicking any of the above links [Changed my mind-links removed. Go find them yourself]. – I’m not going to re-post the pictures of the kids stolen from Facebook pages and creepily posted on these pedo sites, or the child pornography.
The “Trapbait” category, moderated by Violentacrez, features trans (“trap”) underage (“jailbait”) children, and featured 14 year old Nicole within days of the Boston Globe article under the title “Meet Nicole Maines”.
A thread was also started on “/r/ T-Girls” about Nicole titled “The sister is coming along nicely”:
It’s time to get these pedophile sites removed from Reddit, which is owned by Advance Publications. According to their website, Advance publications “is a privately held communications company that, directly or through subsidiaries, owns Conde Nast Publications (Vogue, Architectural Digest, Vanity Fair, The New Yorker, etc.) Parade Publications, Fairchild Publications, American City Business Journals, the Golf Digest Companies, and newspapers in more than twenty-five American cities; Advance Publications’ subsidiaries also have extensive interests in cable television, as well as in Internet sites which are related to its print publications.
The company is privately owned by Samuel Newhouse Jr. and his brother, Donald. Samuel is the chairman and CEO and is the 47th most wealthy human being in the United States.
Here is a partial list of Advance Publications properties:
I don’t think Advance publications will be responsive to public outcry or complaints. First of all, they don’t even have a headquarters. Instead, I suggest that concerned readers contact their state representative and say (in your own words):
“I am contacting you because I am deeply concerned by the exploitation of children and child pornography on the internet site Reddit.
This site posts stolen pictures of underage children from social networking sites for pedophiles to view. This online sexualized harassment and bullying of children should be condemned, and prosecuted.
Even though Anderson Cooper exposed what these Reddit sites are doing, most of them are still up and running. I do not think Reddit should be allowed to post pictures of minor children stolen from social networking sites for the purpose of sexually exploiting minor chidren. It is disgusting and outrageous that these people can get away with this.
I would like you to look into the matter and contact Advance Publications, who own Reddit and demand that they remove these awful sites. I also think law enforcement should be involved and these guys should be arrested.”
Here is a link to your Representative:
Let’s shut down these child exploitation Reddit pedophile sites once and for all.
*Dallas peeps- feel free to drop me some data on “violentacrez”. Your anonymous comment will not be published.