Led by the parents who simply didn’t know (or want to know) better
December 13, 2011
One of the saddest reports yet on the sterilization of a gay child to “cure” him of his sex-role nonconformity and homosexuality. He is also framed as a deformed child with a medical birth defect for his “unacceptable” tastes in toys, activities and clothing.
The whole Boston Globe article, titled “Led by the child who simply knew” is an exercise in the triumph of conservative homophobic sex-role norms, and the promotion of heteronormativity through reparative experimental medical and surgical “therapies”.
“ Wyatt was a girl to the core, and now lives as one, with the help of a brave, loving family and a path-breaking doctor’s care.” The Globe’s Bella English fawns.
What makes this gay male youth “a girl to the core”? The article compares his sex-role conformity to that of his identical twin brother:
“ Jonas and Wyatt Maines were born identical twins, but from the start each had a distinct personality.
Jonas was all boy. He loved Spiderman, action figures, pirates, and swords.
Wyatt favored pink tutus and beads. At 4, he insisted on a Barbie birthday cake and had a thing for mermaids. On Halloween, Jonas was Buzz Lightyear. Wyatt wanted to be a princess; his mother compromised on a prince costume.”
Jesus. They couldn’t even let the four year old kid dress as a princess for Halloween- because that would be unthinkable for a boy, get it? God forbid you let a tiny impressionable kid wear a princess costume without making it into a horrible taboo so memorable that the family still recollects the “incident” ten years later. So much for being “led by a child”- sounds more like you made a big fuss about his liking sparkles and garments that drape. It gets worse:
“Once, when Wyatt appeared in a sequin shirt and his mother’s heels, his father said: “You don’t want to wear that.’’
“Yes, I do,’’ Wyatt replied.
“Dad, you might as well face it,’’ Wayne recalls Jonas saying. “You have a son and a daughter.’’
Yep, cause that’s what girls are.
The article goes on to tell us that the parents wondered what was up with the kid, was he gay? Was he too young to even speculate? One thing was for sure. It wasn’t okay, whatever it was. After the parents put the kibosh on the four year old’s play behavior and made a big taboo out of it, the kid said he didn’t want to be a boy! What four year old would if it meant you couldn’t play the way you wanted? If it meant you were “bad” for dressing as the little mermaid or whatever the fuck? Can’t I just be a girl then, and play the way I want without all the angst and trouble? Being a “princess boy” was apparently not an option.
“Baffled, they tried to deflect Wyatt’s girlish impulses by buying him action figures like his brother’s and steering him toward Cub Scouts, soccer, and baseball.”
“When the boys were 5, Kelly and Wayne threw a “get-to-know-me’’ party for classmates and parents. Wyatt appeared beaming at the top of the stairs in a princess gown, a gift from his grandmother.
Kelly whisked him off and made him put on pants. Though she and Wayne were accustomed to his girly antics, they were afraid of what others might think.”
Jesus. What an incredibly humiliating experience- and message that must have been for Wyatt. But his parents just couldn’t deal with a boy like that. Grandma’s princess gown was a dirty shameful secret to them. And this kid’s flaaaaaaaming clothing choices were a humiliation. Like some sort of tragic birth defect.
“Even when we did all the boy events to see if she would ‘conform,’ she would just put her shirt on her head as hair, strap on some heels and join in,’’ Kelly says. “It wasn’t really a matter of encouraging her to be a boy or a girl. That came about naturally.’’
Because boys don’t want to have long hair and wear heels. Ever.
That’s what girls are.
When Wyatt was taught that boys don’t do these things, and he said well then I don’t want to be a boy, mom started researching transgenderism. Dad hoped Wyatt would grow out of this sex-role nonconformity but was fearful that he wouldn’t. Such behavior being unnatural and unacceptable and all…
The Globe reports that “Even the family Christmas card became a challenge. They would write about Jonas’s affinity for sports and Wyatt’s “flair for the dramatic.’’
Oh my goodness! The challenge! It was like Darfur with the kid being a giant drama queen! What will the neighbors think! The agony of a boy like that.
That’s what girls are.
Mom talked to the family doctor, who blew off her concerns. Nothing wrong with the kid! The Globe is careful to describe him as an “elderly pediatrician, nearing retirement” – cause those old doctors with a lifetime experience are, like all elderly people, incompetent- right? Mom needed a doc who understood this kid needed fixin! So mom went shopping for a doc who had a more Genderist philosophy and who was supportive of the idea that there was something wrong with Wyatt. She found one. And all before the first grade!
Poor kid. After all the agonizing and “challenges” over the poor kid’s “unacceptable” behavior they stuck him with a therapist at around age 6. Gotta fix this kid! Mom kept up her sex-change research all the while, and when he was eight, she heard about a Boston doctor’s fledgling experimental eugenics program that aimed to “cure” dramatic, flamboyant boys like Wyatt- by turning them “into girls”, thus “fixing” them. He would fix everything!!! Wyatt started calling himself a “girl-boy”, and his parents finally allowed him to grow out his hair a bit longer. In a school essay he wrote that he “likes to wear bikinis, high heels, mini-skirts”. LOL no boy- even one pissed off that he was taught from the age of four that he had a sex-role birth defect would write that.
That’s what girls are.
When he was nine the parents had his name legally changed from Wyatt to Nicole. Well, dad says he left the whole thing up to his wife. But whatever. After Wyatt’s name was “fixed” the family allowed him to grow his hair long and wear the clothes –finally!- that he wanted. There was no humiliation now. He had a birth defect- a sex-role birth defect!
The quotes from Dad and his son Wyatt/Nicole from this point forth in the article are pretty much verbatim quotes from the speech they gave at a GLAAD fundraiser they appeared at. Suffice to say that when the parents finally allowed him to act as he wanted everything went swimmingly. Until one day. The Globe reports that:
“But one day a boy called her a “faggot,’’ objected to her using the girls’ bathroom, and reported the matter to his grandfather, who is his legal guardian. The grandfather complained to the Orono School Committee, with the Christian Civic League of Maine backing him. The superintendent of schools then decided Nicole should use a staff bathroom.”
The truth is that another boy started using the girl’s bathroom too. He didn’t wear dresses or change his name but for whatever reason the other kid also started using the girl’s restroom. Faced with increasing numbers of boys potentially using the girl’s room, and no way to make a distinction between Nicole’s use of the girl’s facilities and the other boys doing so, the school decided to keep the restroom set aside for female bodied children for female bodied children and to allow Nicole to use a private staff bathroom if he wanted.
Nicole’s parents did not like the fact that the school was not pretending that their son was female-bodied. They did not like being reminded that he had male anatomy. They found the compromise of access to a private staff bathroom was unacceptable because it made real the fact that their son was not female. And a son like that was not okay. What if their “deformed” son was bullied? The school district responded to parental concerns and was determined to prevent the child from being bullied, even assigning a paid staff person to keep an eye on Nicole in between classes to make sure no bullying occurred- even though Nicole was “elected vice president of her class and excelled academically.”
All these measures were not good enough for the parents, who decided to sue the school for having separate restrooms based on sex, not “gender”. Because their son now says he has a feeling inside, one that says he is no longer a boy-girl, but a girl-girl, and that “feeling” that a male can have- is what a female is.
The case is pending.
The parents continue to pursue a “fix” for their challenging, dress-liking, drama-loving son. They found that in Dr. Spack, the doctor who runs the experimental reparative treatment center in Boston:
“The most striking thing about these kids was the fact that they were just normal young people who had this incredibly unusual and problematic situation,’’ says Spack, 68.” (Gee, Boston Globe, shouldn’t that be the “elderly and nearing retirement” Dr. Spack?)
Dr Spack says “we can do wonders” with the appearance of children medically/surgically “if we can get them early”. Oooooh. Medical wonders on the appearance of formerly healthy children, causing lifetime disability and sterility before the age of maturation…. You cwazy science you!
The Globe outlines the arguments against the sterilizing disabling “treatment”: religion and that the kids are too young. It never occurs to the writer that sex-roles themselves are artificial. Oh hell noes! Birth defect! Deformity! Incorrect! Fix! Girls=femininity, Boys=masculinity! Conform! Conform! Conform! Heartwarming story of challenging adversity!!! Maintain order!
The Globe reports- and I want you to remember this in years to come- that the Gender Management Service Clinic run by Dr Spack in at Boston Children’s Hospital, referred to by the happy shiny acronym “GEMS” : “Though GeMS treatment is now considered the standard of care by mainstream medical groups, some have their doubts.”
That is total crap. Even the WPATH standards of transgender medicalization – which are written for the sole purpose of preventing lawsuits against the very few doctors worldwide that engage in these practices (even though they are very profitable and have long waiting lists)- does not rubber stamp the radical experimental “treatments” of Spack’s “GEMS” reparative childhood gender treatment. Research, Boston Globe, research! You’re talking about bullied gay and sex-role protesting children being sterilized in childhood here! Best to research the facts about that, huh?
The Boston Globe actually quotes bible passages here. Not kidding.
The Globe goes on to say that only 95 children have been treated at Boston Children’s Hospital’s GEMS clinic since it was started five years ago, even though the clinic purports to be primarily established to treat intersex children (those with disorders or differences of sexual development such as AIS or Turner’s syndrome or congenital anomalies). What does that tell us? That tells us that caregivers of intersex pediatric clients are running away from, not towards the “help” offered by this clinic. And since they report that one third of the clinic’s child clients are on puberty blockers that tells us that this is a failed DSD/intersex clinic now recouping it’s losses by “treating” gender-rebelious children like Wyatt/Nicole. Such treatments are very expensive and privately paid because they ARE NOT considered the standard of care by mainstream medical groups and insurers. Thus they are very profitable.
“The effects of the blockers — an injection given monthly to prevent the gonads from releasing the unwanted hormones — are reversible; patients can stop taking them and go through puberty as their biological sex. This is critical, Spack says, because a “very significant number of children who exhibit cross-gender behavior’’ before puberty “do not end up being transgender.’’
This is a lie. The part about “most kids who exhibit cross-gender behavior before puberty do not end up being transgender” is true. But NOT when those children are put on puberty blockers! The ONLY study of sex-role noncompliant children “treated” by puberty blockers (70 children in the Netherlands) shows that EVERY child put on puberty blockers goes on to cross-hormone “treatment”- a reversal of every outcome study for non-treated children. In other words, putting children on puberty blockers prevents them from growing up non-transgender. Once children are placed onto puberty blockers, the normal maturation is aborted, which prevents that majority from not ending up “being transgender”. And Spack damn well knows this. Puberty blockers prevent resolution of childhood gender dysphoria. Those children were not followed past cross-hormone treatment and no long term outcome studies have been done. No other studies have been done. These kids are truly guinea pigs for homophobic conservative people that have taught them they have “birth defects”.
In the article pics you can see how Nicole has been placed in suspended pre-puberty, compared to “her” twin brother. He looks like a younger boy. The family pays around $1200 a month to do this to him. Nicole says: “I would say my brother got lucky with me. Because we grew up with only boy neighbors, I developed a liking to shoot-’em-up and military video games,’’ she says. “I could have come out a lot girlier.’’
Ohhhhhhh. Wowwww. That’s why females like FPS and military RPGs!!!! Because they grew up with boy neighbors ! Cause them are boy things!
And not what girls are.
“Nicole says she’s excited about the idea of surgery, though a bit worried about the results — “and maybe the pain, too.’’
No wonder. More than half of males who undergo such surgery suffer from urinary incontince for the rest of their lives. Chronic urinary tract infections are another complication.
From a trans forum: “I had the op – a colovaginoplasty – in the late 90s. I don’t know any other transwomen and I’m wondering if others have experienced a rather icky situation I have had the whole time post-op.
I get a buildup of … stuff … at the back of my vagina which needs weekly douching. When I had the surgery I was told that the colon lined vagina was self-cleaning.
I had the buildup checked out very early by my GP because I was worried I might have a fistula or something. It smelt so awful. No e-coli found. Apparently it’s a buildup of the the natural lube and slewing. It seems that there’s a kink at the back, behind the muscle, where the stuff collects. So I’ve douched weekly all these years to keep clean.
I’ve been to a number of surgeons and apparently there’s nothing that can be done to fix the problem. It’s for life.
Trouble is, when I douche I can never push all the stuff out. I’m sorry, I know this is gross. It means that the stuff I haven’t been able to get rid of straight away hangs at the back and it suddenly pours out afterwards without warning. Sometimes it happens six hours afterwards. This means I have to waste one night every week on cleaning.”
But hey, it might be worth it to Wyatt. Not only can he finally act the way he wanted to since his parents rejected him at the age of four, but he is now getting attention, huge special snowflake attention for his “transgender” status. And still from his parents, in this quote his dad Wayne:
“In conversation later, Wayne tells another story of how things have changed, for good and forever. He and the twins were getting out of the car recently, and he grabbed their hands to walk with them.
Jonas, being a teenage boy, shook his father off, while Nicole was happy to walk hand-in-hand, swinging arms.
“She’ll do that the rest of her life,’’ Wayne says with a wide grin. “It was an epiphany for me.’
Because men just don’t do that! Unless you live in the middle east, where all men hold hands. But hey. Maybe they can be fixed.