R.I.P FagHag

January 8, 2013

faghag creepy straight dude

Rest in peace Fag Hag. And also Rest in peace creepy hetero dude. They’re all “trans men” and “trans women” now. Remember the FagHag? The FruitFly? Those drag-queen-like-women who haunted the gay bars because, although women, felt that gay men were their soulmates? So they dressed up all flaming and shit? Flaming like a layday? They would hang around at last call looking for dudes who would take them home. Like F2T blogger Matt Bailey, who advises females on how to escape the female lot through medicine but who over-plucked her eyebrows as a faghag for so many years that injecting all the testosterone in the world will never remove the surprised lady look from her visage. She’s a “fag” now. A “lady fag” with a ‘gina  and all. Second hole. BONUS HOLE yo. Not to pick on “Matt”, but for real: the FagHag era is dead. They are all “transmen” now.

And the creepy hetero dudes. Remember the yucko hetero dudes that haunted the corners of lesbian spaces, uninvited, unwanted, and leering, longingly? They are still there! Only now they are “trans-women”, hopped up on black market estrogen and wearing bad wigs to cover the male pattern baldness.

The last time I went to a lez bar (recently!) there was one in every corner- same as the creepo straight dudes used to be- manning their posts, looking forlorn. Same as it ever was. But they are “women” now.

Straight people have always creeped on gays. Weirdo straight people have always edged into gay and lesbian spaces. Because Gay/Lesbian= Kinky Sexay Times! Never mind that Lesbians and Gays on the whole are fairly average and boring. Oh Noooooooo. It’s the sexayyyyyyyy. It’s the “not straight”! So Faaaaabulous.

Now we get creepy straight faghags like Stephen Ira (Katherine Elizabeth) Beatty and creepy hetero dudes like Tobi Hill-Meyer (and a million other dudes) inflicting themselves on gays (who ‘aint having it so much) and lesbians (who are under a deluge of these fucking bastards). Because= Jendur!

I propose this day, January 8, arbitrarily, as the FagHag and Creepy Straight Dude day of remembrance in the Lesbian and Gay community. Goodbye FagHags! GoodBye Creepy Lurking Straight dudes ! Oh Haiiiiii Trans “allies to the lesbian and gay community” !

18 Responses to “R.I.P FagHag”

  1. sylvie Says:

    I don’t understand why M2T don’t buy better wigs? Yes good wigs are expensive, however they always seem so keen and desperate to look passable yet always THE HAIR.

  2. Marie-France Lesage Says:

    For you, GM:

    Of course I was a fag hag when I was a seventeen-year-old college frosh, but in my defense: they started it!!!

    My neighbors in my slummy apartment were a group of 20-something and older gay male cross-dressers who adopted me and insisted that I dress up with them and hit the bars — not that I resisted very hard. It was fun to be wanted/needed by someone after years of feeling weird and unloveable. I lent them more dresses than they lent me, but they were wizards with false eyelashes. (Blushing at the memory of the makeup I let them put on me — blue eyelids and fake beauty marks. Eeek.)

    They must have thought they struck the motherlode when a 5’10” girl with big feet moved in next door! Not only could I lend them high heels, they could take me shopping as “cover” and have me try things on for them — a very important role in the south in the early 1970’s where getting beaten to a pulp was a daily risk for them.

    Of course, this was before being a fag hag was a thing — I don’t remember any straight couples coming into the gay bars to point and giggle, either.

    I outgrew being a fag hag the instant I realized that some gay men found my presence offensive. (More blushing.) But hey, I was a kid from the suburbs and about as socially sophisticated as a puppy.

    It’s amazing how the culture has changed. As lonely as I was, as dependent as I was on my gay male neighbors for my only social contact, I can’t even fathom 1970’s me ever wanting a sex change so I could be a “real” gay man. It’s…well, it’s insane, isn’t it?

    • K Says:

      I feel you, Marie-France.

      I too went through a phase of worshiping gay men as my liberators from the dull, emotionally abusive pit of my early teen years. Things were a mite different for me, seeing as the 2000’s provided me with all sorts of tantalizing possibilities in a a sort of Will & Grace package.

      They said I could have a Best Friend 4Ever!!! and a sort of weird sexual anti-tension with some guy who would provide me with the emotional and social contacts I so desperately desired.

      Not too mention the ‘hawt yaoiz’, which were my gateway into the sordid and damaging world of pornography, not too mention becoming a funfeminist. Thank the powers that be that I was lucid enough to realize it was all bullshit before I was completely assimilated.

      Even with all this ‘glitz and glamor’, I never once considered becoming a dude myself. Even in 2006, when the life of a gay male media darling had so much more appeal than the drudgery of my middle school existence. Guess I’m just not doing this whole gender thing right.

  3. Adrian Says:

    Oh but haven’t you heard? If you’re gay and boring, you’re “assimilationist”!!! (And who is usually throwing this insult around? Why yes, it’s the F2T “I’m not just trans*, I’m femmy and GAAYYYYY tooo!!!!” crowd.)

    • KittyBarber Says:

      The ultimate in assimilation is to alter one’s very body in order to fit into the straight and narrow of socially enforced gender-role assignment. They aren’t fooling most of us, anyway.

  4. Chazz Says:

    They are expensive wigs. But as soon as they put them on their gender swelled heads, it all goes to hell.

    But to Gallus’ point…. Fetishists always lurk, stalk and slither their way into spaces to ogle the objects of their twisted desire. It’s what they do. Lesbians have to stop being limp wristed and “out” them on the spot. Politically correctly, of course, but nevertheless.

  5. michelle Says:

    sad thing is that they would figure out some way to turn it around so that, once again, in their deluded minds, it really WAS all about them…its the whole ‘look at me, look at me’ nonsense.

  6. Anonymous Says:

    “Efforts to promote ‘transgenderism’ in public policy deconstruct one of the most fundamental concepts known to mankind. It renders gender, the most basic organization of social systems, completely meaningless. In doing so, activists like Simpson are asking the rest of society to radically reorder the ways in which the culture makes reasonable and rational accommodation for the two genders,” ~Monica Schleicher, Focus on the Family,

      • Marie-France Lesage Says:

        From the link: “True gender subversion is the feminist belief that the traits we classify as masculinity and femininity are actually not inherently connected to physical sex.”


        Gender subversion is me — a tall curvy woman with face, boobs, hair, belly and butt that all scream FEMALE!!! wearing no make-up and relaxed, comfy cotton clothes (long tee shirt, yoga pants, flat walking shoes) while I code circles around the “all programmers must be male” stereotype — oh, and taking zero crap from men at work because there’s not a subservient bone in my body and yes, I am good at my job.

        Gender essentialism would be me thinking, “Huh, I like a relaxed, un-made-up style, I work in a male-dominated industry and am not subservient to the men and I write good-quality programming code for a living — I must REALLY be a man. Let me get some T, buzz off my hair, get a double-mastectomy and a lazy “trans” name. From now on, I will be Maurice-France, not Marie-France.”


    • Loup-loup garou Says:

      People who think there’s such a thing as being “transgender” believe in gender roles just as much as Ms. Schleicher and the organization she represents; they just think some people got stuck with the wrong ones. Some are quite close to FotF in their views about who men and women are, and must be; others get all pomo and mixy-matchy about it. (E.g, the “genderqueer fag-identified masculine of center” youtubers, and their male counterparts who call themselves things like “dyke-identified fierce butchy-femme queers”, etc., etc.) Either way, without a deep and abiding faith in the notion of gender, the whole thing falls apart. Feminists (not the fun kind) have been pointing this out for years.

      If those “reasonable and rational accommodations” Ms. Schleicher is referring to are separate bathrooms and locker rooms for men and women (men and women in the commonly understood anatomical sense), that’s not an especially conservative position. You can find people all over the political spectrum who believe that women should not have to shower, change their clothes, use the toilet, etc., around some character who has a penis. Even if he calls himself Charlotte Autumn Petunia Mae and is way better at applying make-up than all those unladylike cissexist bitchez in their mom jeans. AND even if he calls himself Beebo Radclyffe Gertrude Brinker, has a crew cut, majored in Queer Studies, and has forgotten more Judith Butler than those apolitical, closeted, assimilationist, Ellen-watching, got-married-at-the-local-MCC suburban dyke bitchez will ever read.

  7. FeistyAmazon Says:

    Loup loup garou, is your name a take off of that ‘transmasculine’ group “Loup Garou” that meets every summer for a campout and has patches on the back of their vests(all FTM’s/Transmasculine) like bikers?????

    Anyway, love your posts, and that of Marie France Lesage. Especially this: “Gender essentialism would be me thinking, “Huh, I like a relaxed, un-made-up style, I work in a male-dominated industry and am not subservient to the men and I write good-quality programming code for a living — I must REALLY be a man. Let me get some T, buzz off my hair, get a double-mastectomy and a lazy “trans” name. From now on, I will be Maurice-France, not Marie-France.”-MFL

    Yep precisely, MFL……cuz after all you couldn’t simply be a Butch Dyke eh? Or a woman refusing to be boxed into a ‘gender role’? All those teen and 20 somethings who think they are dudes cuz they like boxers, men’s clothes, reject femininity(like I’ve done practically ALL my life)sleeveless tshirts a few tattoos and sports…MUST be dudes, eh? cuz of the clothes….RIGHT. And not wanting to be herded into poorer paying ‘women’s’ professions like schoolteacher, caretaker, nurse or social services! And wearing big heavy male watches. Must be a dude!

    Yep. you both hit the nails on the head!

    Sick of the creepy MTF’s inhabiting EVERY Lesbian space these days. Do they have ‘ladysticks’ or not? Should we inspect at every Dyke event? Or A la ‘Gattaca’, have a turnstyle that you insert your finger, instant pin prick that detects whether you have XX chromosomes or XY ones….cuz it seems THAT is the only way to know FER SURE. But then we may have to endure a genderqueer or two, or a ‘pre-op’ FTM. Yeah, I’m a dude. but ah…no surgery, no hormones, no male equipment, or the reverse “I’m a female” but no surgery, no hormones yet, and NO female equipment……wow the stretch against logic…yep boggles the mind. That faghags are NOW becoming supposed ‘fags’ themselves….with girly hormone induced voices, bearded, flat chested and flirtaceous with dudes. Or just the opposite tall with a face that almost no woman has, heavy heavy makeup to hide the stubble and the male jaw line, the arrogant presumptive male attitude..but femmier than femme, unless NOW they are considering themselves a Butch MTF! Yep, I said it right, Butch MTF’s, now wanna steal not just Dyke/Lesbian identity but Butch identity too! Yep just had to deal with one at a 97 bio female Dyke event, and about 3 MTF’s of which he was one…….being more ‘Butch’ than all the Butches…sheesh…..like we can’t have ANYTHING. They all wanna become FTM’s, the young Butches/Genderqueers, but now the MTF’s wanna become Lesbos and Butches WHEN THEY COULDA HAD ANY WOMAN IN THE WORLD THEY WANTED, while us Dykes get only the 10% willing to be with a REAL Lesbian/Dyke…..SICK of the cooptation, the creepy het autogynophilic dudes, and the faghags now wanting to be more male than us, and yet, they never will BE us. And us Dykes should shut up and say nothing….

    -Fierce and FeistyAmazon

    • Loup-loup garou Says:

      No, it’s an indirect reference to Loulou de la Falaise, a 1960/70s fashion model and designer who would sometimes use a wolf motif as a pun on her own name. If you add “garou” to Lulu/Loulou, it sounds like “werewolfwolf.”

  8. Bev Jo Says:

    Gallus, this is absolutely brilliant. Very few have made the connection of what we Lesbians had before feminism, with the leering het men staring at us in the bars, perhaps hoping to rape a Lesbian they see leaving alone, with what we have now, those men transformed into a power position they never dreamt of having before, with Lesbians worshipping them, and demanding sexual access to us. We still have the leering men except it’s in coffeehouse concerts and other “women’s events since nothing is women-only anymore. And yes, the new fag hag women claiming to be men, some of whom identify as bisexual, so they chase the gay men while still demanding access to Lesbians.

    Thank you for countering the myth that most F2Ts are Butch.

    And real Lesbians, and Butches are more on the bottom of the heap than before feminism.

    I never understood the obsession with gay men, though it makes sense some women who were isolated did ally with them. All I saw was that gay men had an entire neighborhood to themselves and owned so many spaces and bars, while Lesbians have almost nothing left, and they wanted nothing to do with us and said so. (We had a very separate community but I’ll never forget the newspaper discussion about why the gay men didn’t want Lesbians at a “community” pool party — our vulvas would dirty their water. Never mind their enormously high rate of STDs, hepatitis, etc.) This was before AIDS when suddenly they demanded Lesbian time, energy and blood, and the hell with dying Lesbians then banned from the Shanti project.

    It is all right here, for all to see, except those so far in the male-worshipping cult of the trans myth that they refuse reality.

    You’re a brilliant writer! XOXOXOX

  9. […] to dances to music festivals to record companies to bars has witnessed the “transition” of the same creepy straight dudes who imposed themselves and haunted, sentry-like, the corners of our spaces,  into “transwomen” […]

  10. […] to dances to music festivals to record companies to bars has witnessed the “transition” of the same creepy straight dudes who imposed themselves and haunted, sentry-like, the corners of our spaces,  into […]

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