From Dirt- Trans Trending: Who is Transitioning & the Violence Against Lesbians

April 19, 2013

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Girls are growing up saying JUST HELL NOOOOO to “womanhood” and the sick-ass sex caste system. The treatment of women as stepping fetching fuck-hole invalids – even in the most “advanced” nations on earth is so stark- NO FUCKING WAY do girls want to be “that”. And they’ll do just about anything to opt out. Is the price of escaping the female lot a surgeon’s knife? YES. And to many young women the price- any price- to escape is one worth paying. Tired of being assumed incompetent because of your vagina? Tired of cleaning toilets while the bros stand around back-slapping and “supervising”? Don’t wanna tart yourself up as a porn star before work every day? Being treated as a freak of nature for failure to submit? Asked to show your teeth constantly (what, no smile honey)? Matter-of-fact interactions taken as castrating failure to soothe males constantly, which is your job as a human born female (and failure to do so means you’re a “bitch”)? Don’t care for babies and child-rearing? Sick of constant rape threats? Tired of being targeted every moment of every day? Had enough of less pay for the same work? Don’t enjoy watching entitled penis-bearers being fast-tracked while you work your ass off? Sick of watching guys get pandered to constantly? See no future in this whole “stupid cunt” thing? See the men in corporate snicker together about your female boss? See the articles parsing the female presidential candidate’s choice of footwear? Sick of getting ridiculous estimates from your mechanic? Tired of your opinion being worthless? See a possible escape from the whole fucking lot of it? Thus we have an entire fucking epidemic of female trans-trenders. Possibly the most practical women on earth.

From Dirt:

GRAPHIC IMAGES

Read More HERE.

82 Responses to “From Dirt- Trans Trending: Who is Transitioning & the Violence Against Lesbians”

  1. Bev Jo Says:

    Brilliant commentary, Gallus! Of course it makes sense on many levels, especially to girls and women with no feminist consciousness or solidarity with other females, no Lesbian support or community, no awareness that patriarchy and male hatred of females is the problem, not their beautiful natural female bodies. What a tragedy, and how many will die as a result of trying to be treated as an equal to males? Of course, this kind of self-made violence against females that is caused by patriarchy doesn’t matter to the men blaming women when men attack them.

    • GallusMag Says:

      Thanks Bev. I’m just so tired of people equating female “transitioners” with male autogynephiles. Apples and bananas. Also tired of people acting like female “transitioners” are anything less than utterly (perhaps ham-fistedly) pragmatic. The medical invention of transgenderism is truly an escape valve for those who would otherwise undermine the male-supremacist hierarchy.

      • Cassandra Says:

        There are a few things I’d like to say:

        a) ‘Autogynephilia’ isn’t a thing.
        b) I’d argue that transgender people, by virtue of being transgender, are a big threat to patriarchy. Obviously this is true of trans women more than trans men, because the latter can be passed of as merely ‘females wanting to be male’, but the fact that trans people exist at all completely throws off patriarchy’s ideals of sex and gender. That’s why they’re determined to keep trans people (especially women) down.
        c) If trans men were, as you say, actually women suffering from internalised misogyny, surely the number of FtM transitioners would be MUCH higher than it is currently?
        d) ‘Transgenderism’ isn’t ‘invented’.

      • asukamiyuke Says:

        Your logic’s off.
        1. Yeah it does. It’s just not the current push from the trans lobby because if it were, the rest of society wouldn’t accept it.
        2. The fact that trans folk exist reinforces patriarchal gender roles. That there are people not willing to conform to those roles is normal, and great, butch lesbians have been doing that for years. But when those people become trans, they push the ideology that there is one set of acceptable behaviours for men (masculinity) and one set of behaviours for women (Femininity). This challenges exactly nothing.
        3. Because women are trained to be the recipient of men’s sexuality, while men are taught to be the agent of their own, autogynephilia is far more common in men than women.
        4. Trans gender is the inevitable outcome of a society which has not only strayed away from class analysis and has individualized everything, but also puts heavy weight to the stereotypical gender roles enforced under patriarchy. It is far more common in Western societies, particularly affluent ones, and therefore not a human condition but a socialised one.

      • asukamiyuke Says:

        4 ii. Trans gender surgery was invented by the medical profession to “correct” Homosexuality in men. Do your research.

      • Cassandra Says:

        Asuka, there is no credible evidence for the existence of autogynephilia. Blanchard’s work on the subject is not credible because, among other failings, he failed to have a control group when he came up with the criteria.

        Also, your assumption that trans people reinforce patriarchal gender norms would only be correct if all trans women were what would be seen as feminine, and all trans men were what would be seen as masculine. But that’s not true. Plenty of trans women are masculine, plenty of trans men are feminine. Trans people have just as wide a spectrum of gender expression as cis people do.

        Regarding your fourth point, the paragraph above explains that already – trans people have a huge variation in gender expression, and so it would be erroneous to suggest that they reinforce gender roles.

        The one country where it’s true that SRS is used as a means of ‘curing’ gay men is Iran, which I think we can all agree is horrible. However, that does not mean that it’s true elsewhere. Suggesting it is would assume that trans people are more accepted than homosexual people – do you really think that’s true?

        And if you suggest that the only reason anyone male-assigned could possibly ‘want’ to be seen as a woman (‘want’ in inverted commas because it isn’t a choice, but society sees it that way) is out of sexual perversion, surely that reflects poorly on women as a whole? That’s how I see it – by slating trans women you’re slating womanhood as a whole by extension.

        One last thing – if binary trans people were ‘reinforcing gender roles’, as you say, where do non-binary trans people fit into this?

      • Adrian Says:

        @Cassandra – as far as (b) goes, surely you realize that the entire idea of “transness” or “cisness” is BUILT on the idea that there is one “proper” “matching” “cis” relationship of thought processes/personality to genitalia?

        Why should we accept that to be the case? The whole idea of “trans” is reifying the gender binary, not tearing it down. Heck, you’re willing to have radical plastic surgery and become dependent on prescription hormones for life just to make your thought processes/feels “matching” your genitalia, that seems pretty radically in favor of the binary to me.

        I mean, there’s gotta be some bright line in order for people to cross it, right?

      • michelle Says:

        How ironic that cassandra wants to argue scientific legitimacy if it suits his point yet trans* otherwise does not give a shit about the bullshit pseudoscience they always fall back on…I guess it is only legitimate if it helps the delusional belief and speshul snowflake status.

      • Adrian Says:

        @Cassandra – non-binary trans people? Why, the answer is the same. They go on and on about a special status because wow, gee whillikers, their thought processes and personality don’t “match” or “have the proper relationship to” their genitalia. The only difference is they insist they don’t match either box. Well, just smash the damn boxes already, problem solved!

        The entire point, which people keep seeming to miss for some reason, is that there IS no “proper” relationship of personality type to genitalia. Hence, there’s no “cis” for “trans” to be in opposition to!

        Enjoy your brain, enjoy your bits, quit obsessing if they have a particular “matching” relationship or not!

        If there’s no binary, there’s no need to be “non-binary.” I mean, what, so someone who is male likes to have relationships with other male people but behave “femmy” – that’s one common “third gender” out there, okay, so what? Why should that be somehow persecuted or special for it? Just let people be themselves, already.

      • asukamiyuke Says:

        Anyone who is trans out of a “need” to replace one organ with another (always the outer ones, never a uterus and ovaries transplant, mind you) rather than an overwhelming desire to perform the stereotypical sex roles of the opposite sex, has body dysmorphia, the same as someone who believes they should have been born without a limb.
        The straight men who turn trans (usually in their later years, after being married and raising a family) display clear autogynephilia over and over again in interviews and in their blogs, you see it all the time. Describing themselves as little girls, reminiscing about the times they wore their mother’s clothes as prepubescents, etc etc.
        Non-binary trans people are the smallest minority and represent the tiniest fraction of the population, so if we’re taking gender lessons from them, we’re in trouble.


  2. This is so painful to look at. These poor girls/women. Our society fucking sucks.


      • Just wanted to say thank you for editing the post to have a graphic warning content- the more graphic images caught me by surprise the first time.

        I am seeing more and more comments popping up on trying to use “brain tests” and “gender tests” to identify and screen potential transgender children at a young age, so they can quickly be hormonally and surgically corrected.

        It is truly terrifying.

        Headlines from 2023:

        THREE YEAR OLD BOY PLAYS WITH MOTHER’S MAKEUP; SURGERY SCHEDULED FOR MONDAY.

        TWELVE YEAR OLD GIRL REPORTS DISDAIN FOR FEMININITY, RECEIVES TESTOSTERONE TREATMENT

        43 YEAR OLD FATHER OF TWO CHANNELS SHANIA TWAIN ‘I FEEL LIKE A WOMAN’; MALE-RUN FEMINIST ORGANIZATION NOMINATES 43 YEAR OLD FATHER OF TWO ‘MOST OPPRESSED WOMAN OF THE YEAR’

      • GallusMag Says:

        From the June schedule of the Philadelphia Trans Health Conference:

        Between Pink and Blue: Raising Children Across the Gender Spectrum

        support Group: Parents of Transgender Youth

        Difficult Treatment Decisions for Non-Binary-Identified Youth

        Families of Trans* Kids: Meeting Their Evolving Needs

        Top 10 Fears of Parents of Trans Kids

        One Dad From Maine, One Mom From Minnesota and One Amazing Support Person

        Family of Trans Kids Brown Bag Lunch

        Women are keeping transgender families together. How can we reach more men?

        Caring for gender non-conforming children and trans youth: an exploration of the parents’ experience and challenges.

        Toddlers to Teens (part 1): Clinical Work With Transgender Children Developing and Enriching Clinical Expertise

        Lights, Camera & Action: learning gender dysphoric children’s issues through films.

        Is your child 3-10 years of age? Let’s Talk!

        Parenting our Trans Kids

        support Group: Parents of Transgender Youth

        Artisitic Expressions of Transgender Youth

        Let’s show pride…parents and trans youth communicate

        Reading & Writing the Trans Young Adult Experience

        Toddlers to Teens (part 2): Clinical Work With Transgender Adolescents, Developing and Enriching Clinical Expertise

        The Gender Inclusive School

        Safe and Supported: School Transitions

        A Mother, Her Transgender Son, Their Journey to Love and Acceptance

        The Trans Advocacy Toolbox: Concrete Strategies to Improve School Communities for Trans and Gender Non-Conforming Students

        Dads of Gender Variant Youth Workshop

        Launching your transgender or gender variant child

        support Group: Parents of Transgender Youth

      • GallusMag Says:

        Roughly one third of the programming at the plastic-surgery sponsored conference is directed at a pediatric population.

    • Adrian Says:

      Indeed.

      Meanwhile I’ve seen enough of the FTM pics on tumblr (usually not bottom pics, though) that it’s pretty obvious to me now who has had the top surgery. The scars are pretty obvious on a lot of people even years after.

      • Ashland Avenue Says:

        Those scars will be around for a long, long time. The skin on the chest is notorious for scarring, as it’s rather thick. I say this as someone who’s had a double mastectomy (due to breast cancer) with reconstruction – I’ve spoken with several plastic surgeons over the years, all of them experienced with mastectomy surgery. The skin there just scars. The FtT people will be instantly recognizable by the telltale smiley face they have underneath each tit. So much for walking around shirtless like big man on campus and feeling all dudely.

    • 1899fcbarcelona Says:

      Couldn’t have said it better myself! DAMN…it hurts to look at these pictures. I mean look at that woman’s forearm! There’s like no more meat left on it!

      • Adrian Says:

        Yeah. And I’ve never yet seen a picture of an aftermarket wang (trust me, I’ve looked at a lot of pics out of pure fascination) that looks like the real thing. (Functionally I would think the micropenis that results from just hormones and more superficial cosmetic surgery around the enlarged clitoris is better, if I were getting one, but YMMV. No way in hell I’m doing it.)

        Makes me wonder though if people get tattoos there on the arm to hide it or what.

        Meanwhile the big skin harvest area on the leg, it’s always going to be a huge scar too. A relative of mine has a scar like that because he had a traumatic amputation of a foot in an industrial accident and they needed to get skin from there to graft over the giant wound left. It’s been decades but still it’s a big scar.


  3. Ex-FTM here. I’m so glad I realized that transitioning was a terrible idea before I had a chance to start taking hormones or signing up for surgeries.

    You have it exactly right – I thought it was only logical to want to become a man because I had been so convinced that I was a complete failure as a woman. I’m so glad I’ve finally found people like you who actually understand why it’s so fucked up to think that you can’t possibly be a woman because you don’t want PIV, or you don’t want breasts for men to gawk at, or you don’t want to bear the weight of all the sociocultural expectations and pressures placed on women, or any other perfectly sensible complaint a woman could have specifically because she is a woman.

    I’m absolutely infuriated that I wasted three good years hating myself because nobody ever told me it was okay to be who I was, that I wasn’t alone and I wasn’t wrong or broken or sick in the head. But plenty of people told me “you sound like you’re probably trans,” and I believed them because I didn’t know of any other way to escape the black pit of self-loathing I had been drowning in. I realized after three years that the “trans ladder” I used to climb out of the first pit led me straight into a different pit. The “radfem ladder” I just found has helped me get out of that pit and now I’ve finally reached higher ground.

    • Becky Green Says:

      Lady H.,

      I am so glad you did not go through with transitioning. Please consider writing your story on Dirt’s blog as she is currently collecting stories on that theme titled, “Why I didn’t transition.” Your story will resonate with many girls and women who struggle with these issues. So, once again, please consider posting your story there. I really want females to STOP hating themselves.

      • Becky Green Says:

        Gallus, you’re fucking awesome, truly!

        Although my email address is slightly different, (had to close old account for security reasons) it’s still me. And, I still love and appreciate you and the other strong women on this blog who continually educate me.

      • GallusMag Says:

        Me too! Thank you for supporting the site, x


      • I’d be happy to share my story! I really do think that most of the issues I’ve struggled with are issues that most young women have to face at one point or another, whether they’re lesbians or not. I “coped” with those issues by rejecting my femaleness entirely. It’s so much easier to hate yourself and want to change than to learn to love yourself as you are, especially when everyone around you seems to agree that you’re flawed. Encouraging a young woman to transition is one of the most harmful things anyone could tell her.


      • I’ve written the first part of my “why I haven’t transitioned” story and posted it here: [link removed- GM]

        Gallus, feel free to repost this wherever you would like. I’m working on part two (because it seemed like it was going to be too long to put in one post) and will hopefully have it posted later today or tomorrow, if you’d rather wait until both parts are available.

      • GallusMag Says:

        LH- Absolutely riveting. Can’t wait to read part 2. xox Drop another comment here letting us know when part 2 is up.


      • Part two is up: [link removed-GM]

        I’ll start working on part three tomorrow. This is the first time I’ve really typed it all out like this. I’m finding that I have a lot more to say than I thought I did, and it feels really fucking good to finally spit it out.

      • GallusMag Says:

        Wow that took a strange turn ‘Lady”. Caveat Emptor. Or whatever.

      • GallusMag Says:

        Hey “Lady”, what made you decide to call yourself “Lady”?

      • moss Says:

        I thought it strange and unsettling the idea of a child viewing their sexuality in such a porny way


      • Apparently something I wrote rubbed you the wrong way, Gallus? I’d be happy to explain something or apologize for offending you if you tell me what it was?

        The username “Hydrangea” was already taken and “LadyHydrangea” seemed like a good alternative, considering the topics I wanted to write about here.

      • GallusMag Says:

        Links removed. You’re on your own “Lady”. Good luck.


      • I’m so confused. What on earth did I write that was so objectionable that you felt you had to remove the links to my posts? Obviously it’s your prerogative to moderate your own blog, but I’d appreciate it if you would explain why so I don’t do it again in the future.

      • GallusMag Says:

        You did nothing wrong. I’m just making a judgement call. I wish you well.

    • Adrian Says:

      Good thoughts aimed at you, from here.

      I have to admit I’m extremely glad that when I had those similar thoughts too, trans* was not even on the radar of anything to anywhere I was, because I can see myself having possibly been sucked in (or with this pediatric treatment stuff, being sent in).

      It’s one of the horrifying but can’t look away reasons I was attracted to some of the coverage found on this blog.

      As it is, I’m aware plenty of people do consider me “broken.” But I’ve come to terms with that I guess, as far as it goes. Sometimes I think aging helped, people eventually just figure you’re not gonna change and give up and let you be “eccentric.”


      • Thank you, Adrian. I’m starting to finally accept the “broken” parts of myself too. I’ve come a long way from where I was just a few months ago, but I still have a long way to go.

    • Mary Sunshine Says:

      Oops. Gallus, I got sucked in. Thanks again for your quick wits.


    • Yes it is unsettling that a child views their sexuality in a porny way. That happens way too often these days. The average age for boys who come in contact with internet porn for the first time is 9 (!). There was a case were a 13 year old boy raped a 6 year old girl after watching huge amounts of internet porn. I don’t know how the statistics are for girls but sometimes they are also subjected to these things at an early age too. Of course it twists their view on sexuality.

  4. DM Says:

    Gallus- I’d love to see you do some articles on how these young women go about getting their testosterone and surgery. I know of a 25 year old who has several diagnoses of serious mental illness. She decided about 6 months ago that she was male, and has already found some way to get testosterone. She is heterosexual and when I met her about a year ago, she was wearing cutesy girly mini-dresses and the like. This young woman has been in and out of psych wards and is on some kind of disability. I would like to know how in the hell kids like this are able to get any doctor to sign off on their “transition.”

    • GallusMag Says:

      This has never been tracked but anecdotally the majority of M2T start oral hormones via the black market. Or from stealing some poor woman’s (girlfriend, sister or mother’s) birth control pills. Or like Jenn Burleton of TransActive who stole his mother’s estrogen replacement prescription. Injectables are a bit tougher to access but I’d say a good number of F2T start injectables haphazardly without a prescription. I have personally been offered injectable T from acquaintances on a number of occasions. Multiple dose vials end up with excess injectable T which is supposed to be discarded. Instead peeps offer it to women in their social circle in a really depressing sort of bonding dealio. Unlike estrogen, each T injection causes irreversible changes so lots of F2T take a dose here or there informally, from friend’s overstock. https://gendertrender.wordpress.com/2011/03/31/licensed-nurse-gives-illegal-injection-of-class-iii-controlled-substance-on-youtube/

      As for getting a script above board it’s super easy. In the US and Canada informed consent clinics are the ticket, many without cost and many directed at or limited to those under age 25. A lot of AIDS Prevention funds go to funding free injectable hormones at health clinics for both M2T and F2T.

      For the rural genderist online “gender therapists” will write “T letters” after a set number of “sessions”/cost.

      The whole gatekeeping thing is basically a myth.

      In countries with state-controlled medical care (UK etc) there are private-pay resources set up where docs will authorize anyone for hormones who can pay the price. Very profitable for docs willing to take the risk. https://gendertrender.wordpress.com/2013/01/06/london-gender-clinics-dr-richard-curtis-under-investigation-for-allegations-of-medical-misconduct/

      • Robin Says:

        Goddammit! I needed to know this stuff and I’m grateful to you for putting it up but I think I’ll claw the flesh from my face now. Does anyone know if this Charles girl was disciplined for this whitetrash move? (I’m white; don’t judge me.)

    • GallusMag Says:

      Also DM I extend an invitation for you to write a guest post at any time. x

  5. 1899fcbarcelona Says:

    The sad part is, they really think that they’re men. News flash…you’re a female taking synthetic testosterone. To me it looks like you’re changing one set of problems for another.

  6. BeaGomez Says:

    T is very easy to get–lots of bodybuilders buy it from various overseas drugstores (as do women looking to lose weight, build muscle.) I’m a straight woman, married with grown kids, and work in a male-dominated industry. I don’t look all that feminine, and I’m extremely direct and assertive (hell, I’m aggressive when I want to be.) And I think this trend is sad and dangerous. There are a million-gazillion ways to be a woman, without becoming a fake-man. The FTM’s I know turn out to be more like teen boys, and not in the goofy endearing way. I applaud this blog and others like it for paying attention to this, but I do wonder–where are these girls’ mothers? Do their mothers all fall in line with “what ever you want, dear”, even if it destroys their daughters? Becomng a grown woman shouldn’t be so scary that teen-aged girls would rather not do it–and would rather become eunuchs to do so. (Yes, I know they don’t think they’re becoming eunuchs, but they are.) And why are medical professionals so quick to jump onboard with this? Did you all read the New Yorker story in March on this?

    • Adrian Says:

      Agreed 100%, from someone maybe in a similar situation only no kids.

      Definitely it seems “teen boy” is the goal for many with the whole “boi” thing too, and I must admit the snarkier part of me suspects part of it is because at that age, they sort of “pass.” Granted often it’s twenty-something people who end up looking like 15 year old boys, but it’s boys, and so, hey, wow, they’re happy. I dunno.

      If you google around, you can find some parent blogs. One that I recall uses the fake name “Isaac” for her transitioned “son” and before that the girl’s name was “Ann” (again fake) but I can’t seem to find it now. Anyway, that one, the daughter had done ballet all her life and was very “girly” (by choice or not, doesn’t say, I’m suspecting there were issues) and she comes out to her mother, and Mom just accepts it in the course of a few weeks, and right soon after that, they’re already doing blockers and hormones and all the rest, but if you read the kid’s posts or quotes from Mom, it’s all about I can be free not to be femmy, I can have boy friends, etc. Just… yeah, okay, you can do that as a girl too, is what I’m thinking.

      Completely aside from that, today I read an anonymous submission on a blog by a girl who is upset that her parents won’t let her cut her hair because they “already have two sons, and don’t want another.” Just… WTF? You can cut your hair and be a girl!!! Hello???

      I wanted to read the New Yorker story but I can’t find a way to buy only one story/issue? (I need to go to my neighbor’s house and root through their old print issues!)

      • Adrian Says:

        One other thing too – there is an F2T individual in my company, working in a different department (worked here before beginning transition, so us long-timers know the story). To me, the individual still doesn’t look fully “passing,” but I noticed now there is already male pattern baldness happening regardless. It is like the worst of both worlds. FWIW, plenty of talk on F2T sites is about how much T you can take to get the coveted androgyny or maleness looking without the baldness.

        Women of course will go bald too (I have plenty of old women relatives with very obvious thinning hair on top or even bald spots) but it happens in very old age! I should be lucky to live as long.


      • Omg I found a similar blog!

        http://lifeuncharted5.wordpress.com/

        What you will find there is very dramatic and horrifying. The daughter has to take Lupron (!!) despite the fact that she has Type 1 diabetes. Her father describes how her health declines and never questions why. Perhaps it might be because you give your daughter a dangerous drug even adults fear?

        This is what we can more and more expect in the future. Healthy children are made ill and already ill children’s health declines. All that in the name of gender.

        I’ve never seen trans activists question Lupron despite it’s dangers. The only people who talk about it are prostate cancer patients and adult women. And these people fear it.

      • GallusMag Says:

        Funny you should say that about Lupron, the standard off-label drug treatment for “transgender children” so often cited as “completely harmless and reversible” when used against physically healthy but mentally gender-sick kids. All the adult trans sites warn against it due to horrific systemic irreversible side effects. Example from “transgendercare.com” (bolding theirs):

        “Leuprolide acetate (Lupron)

        Leuprolide acetate (Lupron) is used as an anti-androgen as it has the potential to reduce testosterone to castrate levels. It is an analog of naturally occurring gonadotropin releasing hormone (GnRH or LH-RH). The analog possesses greater potency than the natural hormone. Lupron is normally used in the treatment of advanced prostatic cancer when orchiectomy (removal of the testicles) or estrogen administration are either not indicated or unacceptable to the patient.

        Lupron does carry a variety of risks that have been associated with its use including a variety of cardiovascular difficulties (congestive heart failure, ECG changes/ischemia, blood pressure changes, murmur), musculoskeletal pain and fluid retention. While the non-transgender male suffering from prostatic cancer may consider these risks acceptable as compared to castration or estrogens, these same risks seem absurd in the parlance of a feminization regimen.

      • GallusMag Says:

        They characterize the risks from Lupron as “absurd” in adult transgenders. But in kids this drug is constantly cited as harmless. The lack of oversite is horrifying.

      • 1899fcbarcelona Says:

        Harmless, yeah, right…that’s crazy! If I were a parent there’s no way I could poison my child like that, that’s child abuse. My gosh people…if your daughter wants to shave her hair off-let her! If your son wants to play with a pink barbie car, LET HIM!!!!!

      • Ashland Avenue Says:

        HOLY SHIT THOSE PARENT BLOGS. After being horrified by the one that Lilly linked to, I ended up being led to a couple of others by links in the comments sections. (Hey, they don’t call it the web for nothin’.)

        The one that really blew me away is written by a mother whose 13-year-old daughter came out to her as trans. ( http://transformingfamily.net/ ) The parents accept this completely, even though the kid has been very depressed already for a couple of years and also has an eating disorder. Okay, I realize that the depression may have been due to being trans, but somehow I think there’s more going on here. The girl has two older brothers who have also totally bought into this.

        Just over a month after her daughter announced that she was a boy, the parents went and filed the paperwork to change her name to her chosen male name. Remember, the kid’s still 13 years old. The name change became official just a couple of days later.

        Two months after the announcement, the mother puts up a post describing her frustration at finding an endocrinologist willing to “treat” her daughter with hormones. Nope, not puberty blockers, testosterone. Later that month they celebrate the kid’s 14th birthday with, of course, her new name on the cake and cards directed to “son” and “brother.”

        Five months after the announcement, the kid has a implant put in her arm to block puberty. The posts from earlier this month state that the daughter is now starting testosterone. Also, they have a consultation appointment this month with a surgeon who is willing to do top surgery: “…which will hopefully happen this summer.”

        A double mastectomy, on a fifteen-year-old.

        I….I don’t have words for this. As a woman, as a lesbian, as a woman who’s had a double mastectomy. As a citizen who looks out for all kids. I’m not sure what the girl’s sexual orientation is; I just couldn’t read more of the blog to see if the mother ever mentions it. I bring that up only because I wonder if despite having such “progressive” (at least, in their eyes)parents, the girl is simply a butch lesbian, or hell a butch straight or bi woman, and can’t come to terms with that? I don’t know. I’m just speechless. Horrified.


      • I read the transforming family blog. The woman writes that her daughter is still depressed despite the fact that she gets hormones, surgery and so on. Not only this. She also writes that there are girls who are STILL depressed POST-SURGERY and HORMONES! I wonder why…perhaps because transness isn’t the root of the depression but some sort of a coping mechanism? These poor girls. Trans surgery just works on the surface for a certain amount of time. If you look at studies you will see that the mortality rate isn’t lower post surgery but higher.

  7. Chocolattruffaut Says:

    This is absolutely heartbreaking. I think the only way to combat female self hatred isto build a stronger feminist movement, one where ALL women feel welcome and heard. I don’t see any sisterhood in the blogosphere right now,just feminist one upmanship and silencing of “bad” feminists. Here’s an example I experienced just the other day:
    On FCM’s most recent blog post, she encouraged lurkers to contribute to the comment section. I’ve never commented there before, but after seeing how she treated some new commenters who admitted they were new to radical feminism, I wanted to write something.
    I wrote that I didn’t intend for my comment to be a “tone” argument, but that I felt she was alienating a lot of women who want to join the feminist movement, but weren’t familiar with the theory (especially poor, working class, and/or younger women). Did she realize how many women she could be scaring away by talking to them like they’re stupid and lack “reading comprehension?” Why does she approach all questions like they’re a form of antagonism, and then accuse commenters of being “reformists” (who are second only to trannies as the worst people ever in her book)?
    And of course, my comment wasn’t published. This is what I mean: how can women who feel ostracized in the “real world” be encouraged to join radical feminism when they’re told they’re not good enough? I think many of the women Dirt mentioned above suffer from the whole “all women are bitchez so I might as well become a men and get respect” which again can only be remedied by a strong and welcoming sisterhood.
    I applaud you Gallus that you still supported FCM even after she censored you and didn’t even give a fucking thank you. I have to echo the brilliant BevJo from the “Censored Again at Radfem Hub” post: “It feels like FCM wants to destroy some women.” I’m sorry for getting so personal in my comment, it just saddens me that so many radical feminist spaces are unwelcoming.

    • gynodesss Says:

      Hello I also posted on the same post and she did not post my comment. I felt horrible about myself since I thought it was a good comment that added to the conservation. She was my radfem idol and I really looked up to her and she talked down to me like I’m stupid I come from a poor family and am autistic so maybe I do not speak as clear as some but I thought I was a pretty good writer I felt so so bad about myself this is what she said my comment was unclear and rambly and she feels like she was puked on. It sucks because I agree with her views more than most radfems but I have a radfem fried named Sister Trinity she runs the blog passing the flaming sword I emailed her and she made me feel a lot better a lot radfems I met on twitter like terriisstrangeinc and sistertrinity are very kind and dont make me feel stupid. this is what she said about my comment: “lurker” sitting in the trash right now bc its so long and rambly i felt like someone just barfed on me. its so rude. i couldnt even finish it, and yet before i can publish anything here i have to read and comprehend every single word bc the first time i dont it will be the time some joker plants a dirty limerick in words 1733-1799 of a 3000 word comment. come on people.
      It makes me feel better how even though trinity doesnt agree with the biological male violence theory she never told me I was wrong to agree with her. She also a radfem101 q & a that is very non judgmental even though she could be reformist. Dont lose hope there is a strong community here. Peace sister.

      I know she was referring to me in that comment bc I am the one that left a long comment I didnt expect to be treated like an idiot but I’m used to that irl suffering from a learning disability similar and some argue on the autism spectrum. I did feel kind of suicidal I feel so low but its not her fault I realize she could have thought I was a troll and if you are the one calling her liberal I do think what she said sounds liberal for lack of better term and freaking confusing so womens communities dont work but neither does reformism but yet are separatism? Lately I have been leaving short comments less someone call me rambly but oh well maybe my voice will help someone somewhere feel less alone and that matters. I feel stupid for having cried. Sry also for being so personal. I try my best. Does anyone know of any bloggers with similar views as FGM? I keep wanting to read her blog I LOVED it, it got me into radfem now it gives makes me sad and hate myself like I’m not smart enough.

      ‘but yet are separatism’ I meant is a separatist.
      I read the post multiple times it doesnt make sense how u know fully well women only communities cant work due to power dynamics but u still consider yourself separatist? You were right to point that out it was obviously not a personal attack I would have basically said the same thing had u not said it first. Her suggestion of a time when women were free put so much joy in me I had a lot to say, then I felt talked down to like a little simpleton.

      I feel better that I’m not the only one she first deleted my long comment that she said felt puked on her and than proceeded to delete all those of the other young radfem. Wish I had of saved that comment she made me feel bad but I don’t think it was as stupid as she made me thinks it was insightful and it actually wasn’t arguing with her just contemplating she gave me so much to think about and even said she was open to ppl like me and then shit on me. Do u think its possible shes really a male posing as a radical feminist? Trying to give legitimacy to the hateful elitist radfem stereotype?

      • GallusMag Says:

        Yeah, No. I took the liberty of stacking all your trollage into one comment so my thread would nor be ruined by you pissing all over it which is what you tried to do. You are- at best- an incredibly rude and entitled human being. I posted your spew here so women could see exactly why FCM might choose not to subject her readers to it or engage herself.

        I get what Choco was saying about the sense of struggling for communal spaces. And I know Bev has history with FCM. I published those comments rather than delete because I felt they addressed larger community issues. But really, I am going to call bullshit here.

        Does anyone think that FCM has more free time than you to dedicate herself to keeping the lights on at her blog, posting regularly, moderating constant hate from trans and MRAs, etc? I assure you that she does not. Each and every one of you is perfectly capable of creating a community space that suits you, with all the work that entails. Yes, it does suck when a blogger you like has a moderation style which clashes with your needs. But FCM doesn’t owe you, me or anyone a fucking thing. Is she obligated due to the fact that she puts her time and energy into creating a blog? No. She owes us nothing.

        If someone sets up a purported “community blog for all” then more flexibility should be expected. But if FCM wants to run her comments/conversations a certain way than more power to her. My moderation style is pretty much the opposite to FCM’s – I do not respond to every comment, even OFTEN ones I would like to have the time to but don’t. Many of you would be shocked if you knew the number of hate comments I have to wade through for every one that is publishable. If I did not do that this blog would bore the shit out of all of us. Do I have more free time than any of you? NO I DON’T. I encourage those who feel like no online space is a good fit for them to create your own. If you feel underserved there are surely others who feel the same way. Go for it!

        FCM is interested in nurturing and creating a very particular type of thread/conversation on her personal blog. It is a level of directed interaction that many readers find very valuable. At G/T the threads are more all over the place pretty much. Some of you devote an enormous amount of time and energy contributing to this blog in comments and you are the reason I keep going. We are all pressed for time but you prioritize making a contribution to the public discourse here which is invaluable. The same is true with the regular commenters at FCM’s blog: they prioritize preserving the type of conversations FCM is willing to devote her scant free time to hosting/creating. The same as readers (hopefully) will at the spaces you devote your time to creating.

        I know how upsetting it is to spend time typing out a comment only to have it spammed and I try not to do it. But then we have assholes like Gynodess, above who says they are aware they have communication issues but see nothing wrong with taking no steps to ameliorate them for those subjected to them. I don’t know who you are Gynodess and you are not interesting enough for me to care ( 30 seconds on google led me to your “lifetime loloita” posts – puke) but it seems simple enough if you know your comments are incoherent rambly spews to have a friend parse them before submission to the blog of your “idol”, no? Call bullshit on that. Call bullshit on you. Call bullshit on the autism. Call bullshit on the suicide threats. Call bullshit on the entitlement. Call bullshit on the lifetime Lolita. Call bullshit on you wasting my and my reader’s time. Call bullshit on your “twitter references”. Call bullshit on this: “Do u think its possible shes really a male posing as a radical feminist? Trying to give legitimacy to the hateful elitist radfem stereotype?”

        No she’s not male but it’s 99.999999999999999999999999999999999% certain that you are my trolly troll trollerific trolltastic asshole shit fuck. Also: LMAO elitist radfems. HAHAHAHA. WHAT THE FUCK DUDE. Fuck off.

  8. LC Says:

    New to radical feminism. I don’t understand how something that seems so unnecessary and so harmful is automatically accepted as essential for their survival. People compare it to heart surgery or refuse to even consider the side effects(every surgery has side effects!) or how this is anything but cosmetic. Talking to pro-gender normative feminists, seems like we just talk past each other. It’s transphobic to even bring it up.
    …But they seem to be the majority. How do you even keep talking about this without starting to question your own sanity? Doesn’t help that I used to agree with them. Thank you for all your great work, Gallus, I’ve learned a lot from this blog.

  9. Bev Jo Says:

    You are so right, Gallus. F2Ts are still women and will always be women. Their motives for wanting to be men are completely different from men posing as women. And they can return to us.

    Cassandra, “transgender” ARE patriarchy. They wouldn’t exist without male rule and hatred of females. And it is still a myth and con and cult, as real as believing in the “trans-paraplegic” or others on the mythological continuum.

    Using the insult “cis” shows your bias. Show us just ONE of these men who insists he’s a Lesbian describe what a woman or Lesbian is that is not a descent into grotesque fetishizing and caricaturizing of women and Lesbians. These men do not have a clue and hate us. I’ve seen the one who stalked me into the Lesbian community for decades and he is no closer to understanding what a woman is than he was as a clueless man who did not know why any woman would say no to him or what a Lesbian was. He still doesn’t know.

    No studies are needed. Look at them, listen to them, and it is all obvious. So also are Gallus Mag’s brilliant archives here.

    And the money being made by the “professionals,” as Gallus posted, is outrageous and obvious. There is equally no reason why women should be given breast implants, but it is all about money.

    As for F2Ts, it is tragic, and again, money and female-hating. Turning an oppressed people against itself is classic patriarchy.

    “Lady” is almost always a term men pick for themselves in these discussion, and never women. Was that a troll man, Gallus?

  10. Bev Jo Says:

    Thank you, Chocolattruffaut. I also hate to think of the feminists we are losing. When I first came online, I almost quite because of how vicious FCM was to me, and, as I later found out, that was how she commonly treated many women. I think I also got it for being a Lesbian Separatist. I did not understand the worship she got since she seemed to be saying nothing that hadn’t been said forty years ago as standard feminism. And of course being committed to men can make many women turn on other women.

    But her style of demeaning and attempting to humiliate women is not unique to her. It’s a very common method of using women’s oppression against them, and particularly using classism to infer women she disagrees with as stupid, ignorant, uneducated, etc. That hurts all women, but those oppressed by classism are more vulnerable to it. Projection of other insults also is common. The idea is simply to destroy women who dare to disagree, and often who are more radical. Very similar to the techniques that men use against women.

    If these women were around in the early Seventies, they would have tried to destroy the many oppressed Radical Feminists who created feminism. Our was not a privileged movement, but these women’s goals seems to be to make it one. I do not believe these women are truly Radical Feminists, no matter how often they insist they are and name-call us liberal. They will never explain or back up their arguments since they seem unable to and instead just throw insults. Or ban. Or censor.

    It is extremely frustrating to put work into your post and then of course it’s censored. Good for you for trying. I know it’s hopeless with most of that group. I do think they want a segregated movement of the most privileged. Why else treat women with such contempt and hatred simply because they disagree?

    I think we must keep defining Radical Feminism as a Women’s Liberation Movement that is for all women and which NEVER tries to destroy other women over disagreements or use oppression against women (as has been done to Gallus and many of us), and which acknowledges the existence of heterosexism/Lesbian-hating, classism, racism, ableism, ageism, Butch oppression, etc. If we disagee with respect, then we grow stronger and our numbers increase. Potentially, all women and girls could join us….

    • Chocolattruffaut Says:

      Thanks for the support Bev Jo!

      My apologies to Gallus if I came off as mean girlish: that wasn’t my intention at all. I don’t feel entitled to any blogger’s space, I just feel that if if a blogger wants to have a radical feminist discussion, then instead of writing off opposing views as “lack of reading comprehension” she should realize that by doing so she’s alienating underprivileged women. How can all women feel women-identified when radical feminist blogs will only accept contributions from a narrow subset of women?

      FCM has written about this exchange in her comments section. I can only speak for myself, and she didn’t get what I was saying at all (I can’t speak for gyno-whatever). But wow I just love when women call me stupid, it’s not like I hear that from men all the fucking time! Seriously, fuck that shit.

      I apologise again if my comments were offensive to you Gallus, I enjoy your blog very much and I hope I will be able to keep contributing to the conversation.

  11. SheilaG Says:

    The whole trans movement is very anti-lesbian in my opinion, or it is about co-opting lesbian bodies in service to men.
    As for a revival of women’s liberation, that really is the anti-dote to the trans movement. That young lesbians today feel they have to take drugs to be “male” shows that we aren’t getting our message out there about women being fully free, and butch loving, and lesbian positive. It’s hard for me to understand this kind of hyperfeminine propaganda and its effect on the young.

  12. SheilaG Says:

    Bev Jo has always offered clear insight into butch women, and the pride we have in being totally ourselves— we never drank the feminine cool aid, and although we have been attacked constantly by het “radical feminists” whose radical feminism I don’t really get…. it seems that a lot of these women are introverted and have no community IRL that they are developing radical feminism with. With me, I was and am very community based with all generations—young friends, old women, me in the middle. I move in all social classes of women from the very poor and marginal to the wealthiest women. Online radical feminists who drank the feminine fun femme cool aid of the 1990s get mad at the Bev Jo’s of the world. It is still their hatred of lesbians, and het women have real problems with us. We don’t kow tow to them, we find their whining and lack of community based politics annoying.

  13. SheilaG Says:

    So I find the radical feminists I connect with. And I am able to write to them privately, because I can trust their strength, their politics and their butch wisdom. And just for the record, I don’t go in for any of the heter immitative stuff. I find unadorned women beautiful beyond belief. To me a real woman has a face uncomtaminated by toxic products and choking perfume. The feminine has always seemed fake to me, what males force on women. And on a sexual level, I find no attraction to this at all. A butch woman in an elegant jacket or wearing a fedora, the butch woman who is strength personified, the butch self-taught intellectual….those are the women I always fall in love with! They are the women’s liberation movement. The tip off is community. Do the women have a community or are they just armchair feminists who attack butch women?

  14. margeaux Says:

    Not to derail, but as a straight woman, I support women who love women and/or men ( and cats and/or dogs–joke), but trust me–I didn’t drink any Koolaid except that my mom made. ( slight reference to Barbara Stanwyck movie.) and I don’t just love it when anyone think I’m in the grip of the patriarchy because I like high heels. But here’s my question– seems like a number of these girls transitioning have mothers who consider themselves feminists–these are not Mormon mommy-bloggers–WTF? To use a celebrity example, I always wonder why Stephen Ira decided Warren Beatty was someone to emulate.

    • banewmark Says:

      What does that mean “I support”? I think it sounds nice but maybe I am wrong unless you are sending a check or doing someone’s dishes, walking the dog, watching the kids–it is just a nice expression. I suppose the apologetic tone is bothersome and troubling–and I certainly don’t mean to be “mean” but I don’t get it.

      I don’t happen to wear heals because I am clumsy but they are no more or less ridiculous in my mind than a pair of 10lb work boots and I am straight too–not sure it matters or is anyone’s business. So what. I just don’t buy the whole identity thing. There are too many real problems facing all women right now and to be honest I think my straightness have given me a certain set of insights into the male–granted I may have a jaundiced eye.

      The M2T as I see it is a whole different beast than the FMT not at all related. M2t seems to be autoerotic fetish and hatred of women. FMT is some kind of self hatred. Really the best I can tell out there in the world women are just women to most men–either fuckable (they want to fuck) or not and fuckability (they don’t want) has nothing to do IMHO with whether or not the women is straight or not. And there’s the rub, and it speaks volumes. Except for gay men who are in my experience more misogynistic but will use women for other reasons–reproductive slavery included.

      The issue with kids–I dunno I think in some cases motherhood as a role or a position is in crisis in our culture. Which is not to say that I imagine all mothers to be good mothers or terrible. I do think they bear responsibility if they raise a girl that hates or herself or boy that rapes. Kids are sexualized way too early–oh how cute my 4 year old came out as gay and my 6 year old boy is really a girl–all bad, mostly adults working out their own egos and sometimes mental illnesses on the kids. People do get social currency through their kids. Children can be very easily manipulated and learn when they give the parents what the parent is wanting they are rewarded with attention and praise.

      Kids are boring and demanding and it can be very lonely. I think that some parents compete with their children or try to be the kids “friend.” This happens I think in smaller families with one or two kids. I am always so impressed with this blog but not sure I understand everything. I am not sure what “Butch” means these days. If it is a physical description I doubt I would pass muster, but I am almost always mistaken for a man on the page. I write and many editors simply assume I am a man—some I have corrected, others not. I suppose I should care, but I don’t. Women do have much bigger fish to fry these days and it is best for all to pitch in. And if it is the biggest bull dyke or the Mormon mom I honestly do not care because we need both. Our daughters need both—those pictures were just horrifying. From what I say about the kid you mentioned–she is a sad pretentious and spoiled kid—who really wants to be “special” and have a political cause and pc postition that may justify her own extreme emotions to herself. She I think has to do with girls and women becoming voicless or silence–not so much a body or looks thing.

  15. ibsenite Says:

    Re: Ashland avenue on”transforming family”. My mum wouldn’t have let me get my ears pierced at 15! What the hell can possibly be so sacred and inviolable about gender identity that makes some parents pursue this without seeming to consider the magnitude and irreversibility of this? I can’t begin to understand.

  16. Adrian Says:

    @Ashland Avenue – I had misremembered the new boy name! “Transforming Family” is the blog I was thinking of, with the ballerina… horrifying, isn’t it? The early archives are just… I don’t even know. There are so many references to having to “undo 13 years of ‘girl'” on the kid’s room and all that, it seems clear she wasn’t feeling comfortable to be herself, you have to ask “why not?” There’s a vibe of “to be a girl, I have to be this and that and the other thing, and if I don’t want to, then surely I must be a boy” and that’s just the disturbing vibe that permeates it from there.

    Catching up with the recent posts (thanks for finding it!) is a depressing read.

  17. Ashland Avenue Says:

    Regarding that blog – yeah, I had very mixed feelings about whether to include a link or not. Even though I vehemently disagree with what the parents are doing, I…I don’t know. Maybe I’m afraid people will go there and leave mean comments? But then would reading comments from another (maybe passionate) point of view be such a bad thing in this situation, in which a girl’s body and fertility are about to be forever altered (or mutilated, which is how I feel about it)? I just really wish they would at least slow the hell down. The mother seems to really love her kids, but holy smoke – this kid seems to have a lot of underlying issues that bear examining before such drastic actions are taken, if ever. In some of the posts, however, the mom is very defensive and angry when others have questioned their actions or expressed even the slightest caution, so I doubt anything said to her would make any difference anyway.

  18. FeistyAmazon Says:

    “here’s a vibe of “to be a girl, I have to be this and that and the other thing, and if I don’t want to, then surely I must be a boy” and that’s just the disturbing vibe that permeates it from there.”

    That scares me so much, cuz that was where I was at at that age! Thank goodness I wasn’t forced to go to doctors to change ‘genda’ and take hormones and have surgeries booked! There were other pressures on me for sure, and my family never accepted my rejection of femininity, dolls, clothes or activities….but nonetheless I wasn’t subjected to the draconian measures parents are taking these days with their kids. I can’t help think underneath is lesbophobia/homophobia, that if they get their kids ‘transitioned’ at least they won’t be ‘homosexuals’ which is worse than any other fate alive, according to some, even the ‘liberals’. My family was so called Democratic/moderate/liberal and STILL there was IMMENSE pressure for me to be feminine, which I refused to submit to! It’s about EXPANDING who we are as Females and womyn, NOT subtracting it to conform to hetero societal expectations(or even ‘queer’ ones).

    -“Not Queer, I’m a Dyke!”,
    -FeistyAmazon

    P.S. Gallus I love both your and Dirt’s work! Both are extremely vital to bringing out the ‘other point of view’ in an uncompromising way, since it surely is us Female Identified Butch Dykes that are the MOST under attack now, and pressured to transition at younger and younger ages! It saddens me when I hear so many Butch/tomboyish women succumbing to the Kool-Aid, or being pressured to by their peers…..such groupthink, such self-hatred!

    • BadDyke Says:

      Always reinvigorates me to see your posts Feisty — reminds me that it isn’t ALL lipstick lesbians and liberal feminists out there, despite what even the liberal press says. That despite my everyday experience, it isn’t just me. Writing/blogging/thinking is one thing, it’s the living it everyday, despite the fact that sometimes I feel very isolated, as if you are the only woman you know who does this, everyone else seems to be happily accepting SOME form of femininity. But then, everytime I look at what shoes the women students are wearing, then I’m reminded of how far we have slipped back. They may be more likely to get an education, or try for a decent job (before they hit the glass ceiling that is!), BUT their feet are still shackled in footwear that either damages or fails to support, their legs still scrapped or chemicalled smooth, their faces and lips covered in gunk, their hairs pulled and plucked and razored. The same old lesson, that a naked female face is NOT ACCEPTABLE.

      Sometimes seems to me that equal pay, equal rites etc, that was in some sense the easy bit, because actually it is quite hard to justify WHY people shouldn’t get equal pay for equal work. But the social rules around appearance and the preparation a female requires before being able to go out in publuic — that is harder to counter.

  19. Sean Says:

    Holy shit this bigoted stuff makes my stomach hurt.


  20. […] The mother of a “transgender child” who blogs at TransformingFamily.net authors a long and thoughtful response to a few comments that were left about her blog by GenderTrender readers last week on this post: https://gendertrender.wordpress.com/2013/04/19/from-dirt-trans-trending-who-is-transitioning-the-viol… […]


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