It broke my heart.

January 11, 2015

It broke my heart

90 Responses to “It broke my heart.”

  1. I noticed that it’s more and more common for trans allies to downright worship trans people (even the assholes like Mock and Cox)

    Not just in this post but also others I’ve seen before. Perhaps worshipping isn’t the right word – but it’s the only thing that comes to my mind right know.

    • Bev Jo Says:

      Worshipping is the perfect word. We write about how most women are male-worshipping in our book, to explain the betrayal of themselves and girls and women. So that is exactly what women are doing in terms of worshipping men who pretend to be women.

  2. By the way there is a website about how you can spot a cult.

    Compare this to the behavior of the trans/gender brigade. It’s really scary.

  3. Miep Says:

    A man came in with his nails done and wasn’t wearing a dress. SO CONFUSING.

  4. tnt666 Says:

    What the fuck does “dressed like a man” at college mean?? At college, I wore jeans and t-shirts and sneakers, guys wore jeans and t-shirts and sneakers.

  5. So basically she saw a dude with a manicure and assumed he must be trans? Uh, maybe he’s just a dude who is into nail art. It’s huge these days. She does realize some men wear makeup. “Guyliner” is an actual thing. There’s so much “manscaping” going on that Nair has a product just men. When I was in undergrad I liked to dress in Prince drag. Didn’t mean I was trans. Just a huge Prince fan. (still am.) Imma need these morons to take several seats.

  6. GallusMag Says:

    okay I’m stopping now. Maybe.

  7. VC Says:

    Uh, why would students already in college be looking for FAFSA help? You fill out those forms while you’re still in high school. That’s why Calliope Wong’s application to Smith College was turned down -his high school records and FAFSA indicated he was male. Whoever dreamed up this fake post just wanted to gush about a “pretty”, “graceful”, non-existent transwoman.

    • michelle Says:

      IIRC, FAFSA isn’t a one-time only thing…back when I was in school, they had to be completed each year even though it was more or less a formality. The only time I recall NOT having to do one was the semester where I was on a full ride academic scholarship awarded prior to the start of the year (and actually prior to my graduation from high school).

      After leaving that school after a semester, I then did my associates degree out of pocket and never worried about student loans (or FAFSA) until going back to school a decade later (give or take a few years). To me, the forms were pretty simple, but I knew some people that seemed to get them kicked back a few times…

      That being said…most everyone I know that contemplates school nowadays isn’t going in and talking to people about things like FAFSA…they complete it online.

  8. Teal Deer Says:

    It’s funny (not “ha ha”) that the “never never NEVER misgender” rule only goes one way. If a “transwoman” is barely making an effort, and they still look entirely male, it’s a hanging offense to misidentify/misgender them. But you see a dude who just may be a “pretty” gay guy or an off-duty drag queen, and he’s automatically a transwoman who needs protection and liberating.

    • GallusMag Says:

      That’s one of the reasons straights like our broken-hearted friend love transgenderism. It gives them a free pass to express their sexism and homophobia.

      • Teal Deer Says:

        True. “No, he’s not a gender nonconforming man. That would make me uncomfortable. She’s a stunningly beautiful transwoman!” It’s also a great way for a conservative, straight person who’s uncomfortable with how liberals view them to try to convince themself and others they’re more progressive than they are.

      • Miep Says:

        Yeah. If some idiot stranger approached me in a public place and tried to talk to me about becoming transgender, it would feel pretty much the same as when the religious fundies come around and bother me to join their churches. This automatic conferral of a certain status, i.e. “victim who needs our fixin'” is virtually identical.

      • neme Says:

        You got it. Ms. Brokenheart sounds like a creepy homophobe, oppressing & perving on a gnc man. Just like all the other straight kids trying so desperately to “support” a community they don’t understand & are only part of in their pornsick fantasies. Most of them have never even met a transwoman IRL.

      • neme Says:

        And ms Breakyheart The Invasive just KNOWS his true self needs a pink dress. Do these jeans make me look trans?

    • I know, isn’t it crazy? You wouldn’t believe the way they foam at the mouth if anyone, including her own parents have the temerity to call Shiloh Pitt, a girl. She likes to wear “boy clothes” and when she was two she wanted to be called John because she loved Peter Pan.

      My son insisted on being called Anakin when he was that age, to the point that the folks at the daycare thought it was his actual name. Didn’t help that his name is Luke. I guess I’m misjediknighting him.

    • nuthermaab Says:

      indeed, teh tranz wouldn’t care that she “misgendered” a “cis” man. although they might descend upon her to extend the guilt trip…

      “this librarian seems well-intentioned, but her story is a violent erasure of this man’s gender identity. he is clearly TRANSTRANS. he has always felt transtrans, suffering no gender dysphoria. he can’t explain it, it’s just a feeling he’s always had. people erase his transtransness all the time, assuming that he is “trans.” this is extremely transtransphobic and triggering.”

      • LOL!! This thread is cracking me up… Nuthermaab, you should post that as a reply to the “librarian” (probably a made-up character by some male transgender) if you can.

  9. GallusMag Says:

    I am a librarian at a college. It is common for new students to come to the library for FAFSA forms and whatnot. On Friday, a handsome trans-man came in and asked me for some help with forms. He was dressed as a woman. (His nails were not done, his face was so rugged, he carried himself so purposefully.) It broke my heart. How can I help him to know that he is safe to be who he is, and that I will protect his right to be himself?

    • Miep Says:

      “You don’t know me, and this is crazy, but it’s okay if you want to have your breasts cut off.”

      • GallusMag Says:

        Your breasts break mahhhh hearrttttttttttttttttttttt!

      • judysdreamofhorses Says:

        OMG I’m cracking up, that sounds like a hit. Waiting for the day “Mutilate Me Maybe” is blasting in every club in the country.

        “Hey I just met you
        And this is crazy
        But here’s a number
        To a guy who will sell you black market T
        It’s hard to look right at you baby
        Because I’m not sure of your preferred pronouns or internal gender identity
        So call him maybe”

      • neme Says:

        Go and break my heart
        My achy pervy heart…

  10. tnt666 Says:

    Loooooooooooooooooooooooooooove this thread 🙂

  11. Mean while, back at the ranch, a woman left with three kids should not have opened her legs, and the woman who was raped should’ve known not to go drinking at that hour, and the woman who wanted to get equal pay was told to sit her silly ass down, and the woman who asked for a raise was given a laundry list to complete before even thinking about asking for a raise again, and the woman who lost her husband was not lavished with a gofundme account like the man who lost his wife, and the the lesbian teenage girl who got thrown out because she would not give in to her step father’s advances was not presented with a college fund like the homosexual boy who got fussed at by his step mother and posted the secretly recorded video (in vertical) on youtube, and the woman who……….

    • morag99 Says:

      “The problem, simply stated, is that one must believe in the existence of the person in order to recognize the authenticity of her suffering. Neither men nor women believe in the existence of women as significant beings. ”

      – Andrea Dworkin

  12. I would love to be a fly on the wall if the librarian reached out to this slightly gender-nonconforming man and told him how it just breaks her heart that, because of the positively stifling university atmosphere against transgenders, he feels the need to “dress like a man” (What does that mean? Pants?) instead of clothing that reflect the woman he is inside.

    Goes to show he inherent conservatism of the transgender ideology, doesn’t it?

  13. WTF Is This Nonsense? Says:

    So, a beautiful man wearing a jock strap and nail polish came in the library. I told him he was a beautiful woman, and he punched me in the face.

  14. Butch Dyke Forever Says:

    Wow! I’m so glad to know that what makes someone a woman is having such a pretty face and carrying myself gracefully! I guess my butch dyke ass isn’t really a woman then. FACE. PALM. This shit sets the struggle for lesbian rights back so many freaking decades…

    • Teal Deer Says:

      But at least now we know definitively what makes a woman, according to a librarian, no less. Pretty face, nail polish, and graceful deportment. Apparently, uggos, klutzes, and females who work with their hands need not apply.

  15. shediogenes Says:

    My niece adamantly refuses to allow anyone to paint her nails… except her Dad, and then only if he paints his nails too. Sometimes she gets him to paint his nails first and then runs, laughing and pointing at “pretty Daddy” to avoid having her nails done (I fuckin love that).
    Soooo… which one of them is tranz? Or is it both. He keeps the nailpolish on til it wears off or gets repainted, I would love for someone to tell him its ok to transition and be “herself” Oh the asswhuppin that would follow

  16. Ben X Says:

    “Her face was so pretty” is the strangest passage in that paragraph. I understand why it’s there, but boy is it ever nuts.

    • K Says:

      I think it’s because it shows just how deluded the transcult ‘allies’ are willing to become in order to be ‘good’. They will claim that a grown human male has more feminine features than a woman, but they take it a step further and say that he is ACTUALLY A WOMAN BECAUSE HE IS ‘PRETTY’. Because his nails are painted, and that can only happen to chicks, right??

  17. Em Says:

    So now some dude’s presumed gender feels elicit the same protective impulse as, say, a woman with a black eye and a bruised jaw.

    Nice work, trannies.

    • Teal Deer Says:

      Wow. That comparison hadn’t occurred to me, but now that you point it out, that post is in precisely the same tone as someone wanting to help a battered stranger. That’s chilling.

  18. This is very confusing to me. If this person really is a college librarian, I seriously doubt that he or she is responsible for personally directing students to FAFSA forms. It’s usually a clerk or work study student at the front desk. Back in the day, I had work study jobs in libraries.

    @ AnonMale,

    Yeah, and even then, at any real university, there’s probably a *mile* worth of a walk between any given library and the student life / recruitment / records offices that would handle that sort of thing.

    So maybe it’s some office drone at a high school who identifies as a college librarian?”

    The university that I attended had three large libraries (main library, physical science library, and law library), and the librarians, clerks, and work study students were all too busy to make snap judgments as to whether or not someone asking a question is transgender or not. Depending on which library a person started from, it was a good ten to twenty minute walk from the library to the Financial Aid office.


    Yes, the forms can be filled out online.

    Seriously, how in the heck can anyone assume that this student is a transwoman just by glancing at him and talking to him for a minute or so? The person said, “It is common for new students to come to the library for FAFSA forms and whatnot”. According to Trans Logic 101, all new male students with manicured nails, a sweet, beautiful face, and that special lady like way of walking are really transwomen. I don’t know how ladies are supposed to walk and carry themselves, but they do. He “dressed like a man”, but I could tell by his “feminine” features that he is really a transwoman. No, it’s not sexism to say that males look and walk one way, and females look and walk another way. Did he say he was a transwoman? It doesn’t say he did, and who would reveal their gender identity while just asking for directions on where to find a form?

    When someone behind a desk directs students to where they can find financial aid for college (FAFSA forms) and other information, do they instantaneously assume that all males with “pretty faces” and manicured nails are transwomen? How can they make such an assumption by quickly glancing at a person? So, they have never seen this person before, and automatically assume that this young man is a transwoman because he has such great nails and he “carries himself so gracefully” and lady like. This young man could have just as well have been an effeminate gay male, or just a guy who isn’t stereotypical male. I guess this person will automatically assume that all “masculine” looking young women are transmen instead of being butch lesbians, or just women who don’t like dresses, and could care less about their nails. Because he didn’t adhere to sex based stereotypes of what society says is proper “masculine” behavior and mannerisms doesn’t make him transgender or a woman. He is too pretty to be a young man, and I couldn’t help but notice his nails and way of carrying himself. In other words, he is not “manly” enough to be a man, so he just has to be a transwoman. Underlying it all is a form of blatant sexism, but we are supposed to ignore it. How is it not sexism to assume that a young man must really be a woman because he is just too pretty to be a man? It’s sexism, homophobia, and cult like adherence to political correctness all rolled up in one, Orwellian fantasy world. Have we fallen so far down the rabbit hole of politically correct delusion and madness that any gender-nonconformity automatically makes one transgender?

  19. @ Butch Dyke Forever,

    “Wow! I’m so glad to know that what makes someone a woman is having such a pretty face and carrying myself gracefully! I guess my butch dyke ass isn’t really a woman then. FACE. PALM. This shit sets the struggle for lesbian rights back so many freaking decades…”

    It just doesn’t set the struggle for lesbian rights back decades, it sets women’s rights back decades. I wasn’t the stereotypical “girly” girl when I was growing up. With my short hair, pants, and a sweat shirt, if I walked into the library and asked where to find a form, this person probably would have called me a transman and “he”.

    About a year ago, I ran across an article about a butch lesbian who went to the ER. She was able to see what the doctor wrote on one of the medical forms, and it said “Transgender”. The doctor assumed that she was transgender instead of butch lesbian, or just a woman who doesn’t buy into all the “femininity” crap society places on women. I wish I could find the article again. Does anyone remember this article?

    • kesher Says:

      I don’t know about an article, but I think I remember a woman complaining in the comments (possibly here) about looking at her chart and seeing that the nurse or doctor wrote “trans” on it. If I remember correctly, what made it so much worse is that the note seemed to indicate that the nurse or doctor thought the woman was a trans man in “denial” ( i.e. should be trans but hasn’t “accepted” it yet).

    • GallusMag Says:

      I remember it. It was on Tumblr and there was a photo of the medical record attached to the post.

    • Skylark, that story also stuck with me. I saw it on BigBooButch’s blog:

      re: this thread, it always felt really invasive and uncomfortable to me when people would tell me how “pretty” I was, when I was younger and people read me as trans more frequently. It was almost never offered as a simple compliment, rather it was always packed up with a ton of assumptions. A lot of the so-called trans health providers I saw were just cheerleaders with a very specific pro-transition agenda, just like the librarian here.

      In retrospect, I also see it as clearly homophobic, because the dynamics played out pretty similarly to the people (both men and women) who would tell me I needed to “butch up and straighten out” etc – though the complementary ones were a little less overtly hostile. But in both cases it was about trying to control my expression/behavior so that other people felt more comfortable.

      By the way, Happy New Year GT!

      • GallusMag Says:

        Thank you Miep and Snowflake. You are the best! Thank you!
        I believe there was also an initial post on tumblr that originated directly from the woman involved.

        @Snowflake- Happy New Year hon! Good to see you. 🙂

      • Wow that is horrifying. I also agree with a commenter on that post who points out that this sort of thing opens to door to forced “treatment”. I mean, this view of homosexuality and gender nonconformity is absolutely in line with the Iranian government’s. So politically progressive!

    • This is absolutely insane. And you’re right, it does set women’s rights back as well as lesbian rights. I know several het women that don’t “perform femininity.” In one case it’s a deliberate means to strike at the patriarchy, the other two are simply “clean and neat” type women who refuse to waste time on beauty rituals. All three are regularly “read” as lesbians, despite being married to men, but to think that now people will be claiming they’re not even women. That’s fucked beyond belief. It’s scary to live in a world where MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS would make such a huge assumption about you without even asking. Especially when such assumptions could have a major effect on your standard of care.

      • I agree, extremely scary. It’s one thing for strangers in a library to make assumptions, who cares what they think. But when the doctor who is making recommendations for your life & health treatment makes assumptions completely based on physical appearance…wow, that is so presumptuous.

        This is more evidence of how quickly that trans stuff is invading society. Or perhaps it just is the old sexism reasserting itself under the new “inclusive” language. Either way is bad news for everyone, but especially women.

  20. Violet Irene Says:

    I would love to read this story from the other perspective. Like “every time I go to the library this weirdo employee stares at me and makes obnoxious over the top compliments about my nails and says weird shit like ~its ok to be yooooooou~. Is this an awkward form of flirting or?”

  21. @ Miep and snowflakeespecial,

    Thanks for finding the article. I knew I saw it somewhere, and I couldn’t get it out of my mind. This is extremely disturbing to me. Imagine the horror the woman felt when she glanced at her medical record, and discovered that the doctor had written “Trans” in the medical record without even discussing it with her.

    Thanks BigBooButch for posting this article:

    Ass”uming Butches Into Extinction

    by BigBooButch

    “This doctor decided that the butch lesbian in front of her was not actually a butch lesbian but a trans man in denial. In the chart, she writes that this butch is a 48 year old trans man but adds that the “chart will say female.” There was no conversation, there were no questions about whether or not this woman believed she was trans, there was nothing but an assumption; and that assumption was based on this butch woman’s appearance.

    Instead of inquiring, instead of taking a good look at the person in front of her and seeing the woman inside the butch, instead of accepting that a woman can look and dress in a manner deemed by society to be masculine while still being a woman, the doctor assumed this butch lesbian was a trans man and put forth that assertion into the woman’s chart without even so much as a by your leave.

    I can tell you, as a butch, that having something like that happen: the complete erasure of the woman that you are in order to appease a group of people with such a debilitating disorder, they cry “bigot” at the slightest foul, is nothing short of humiliating. In induces a rage that, to be honest, I have no analogy for at the moment. I get irritated when I am mistaken for a man, sure, but when the person hears my voice or takes a more-than-glancing look at me, they realize their mistake, see the woman that I am, and, most of the time, apologize for not paying enough attention to the person in front of them so as to see more than a hat, t-shirt, and pair of jeans that led them to their erroneous assumption in the first place.”

    All this reminds me of the offbeat, quirky old movie, “The Gendercator” by Catherine Crouch in which a butch lesbian in 1970 falls asleep and wakes up in the future. Everyone is either a masculine looking man like the metrosexual guys who hang out in gyms all day pumping iron, and women are frilly Barbie Dolls. It’s extreme “gender” enforcement, and there are no other options.

  22. lin Says:

    “How can I help her … ”

    Give him the FAFSA form he asked for.

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