From an FTM forum:
Here’s what I did; First, I gave everyone in the class a warning about what the performance piece would be on, and told everyone that they could stand up and leave at any time if they became anxious/dysphoric/whatever.
The desks were arranged so that there was a circle of desks surrounding one desk in the center of the room, which had two chairs on either side. This was the “interrogation” desk.
I had people come up and select a piece of paper from a hat. Pink, blue, or white. I then explained what the colors meant. Blue was boy, pink was girl, white was non-binary.
For the students who’s gender identity matched with the piece of paper they drew, they got a piece of cake. The other students were asked to wait. I made a point to ask the “cisgender” students how much cake they wanted, and was very polite. I told the other students they would have to come prove to me they were their gender identity, and not the identity that the piece of paper said in order to get the cake.
I sat at the “interrogation” desk, and one by one had the students come forward. There wound up being a lot of “trans” students, which wasn’t ideal, but math just didn’t work in my favor here.
I was awful to the students who were “trans” when they tried to prove their identities to me. The first girl who came forward, who had pulled a blue “boy” piece of paper, argued with me that because she was raised mostly by women she was a woman. I told her that she was just a faggot, ect. She continued to argue with me, and I rejected everything that she said. If she said she was a woman because of her genitals, I said that her genitals didn’t prove anything. If she said she was a woman because she felt like it, I asked her to explain what that “felt” like, and she couldn’t explain it.
Towards the end she sat completely confused, at a loss for words. She admitted that she couldn’t prove her identity, and fell silent. I had decided to give students a piece of cake when they were visually disturbed, so I gave her a piece of cake then. I made it much, much smaller than the cake given to the “cisgender” students, and threw it down rudely.
There were a few people who simply gave up in order to get the cake, and said they were an identity they weren’t. I gave them cake equal to the “cisgender” students, as a sort of “reward.” There was one student who turned out to be a trans girl, although I think she was shy about coming forward at first with the other “cisgender” students. Even though she had pulled the pink piece of paper, because she was “biologically” male she wasn’t sure if she was allowed the cake. I gave the cake to her when she explained this.
There was a man who had pulled a pink piece of paper who came forward and tried to argue with me that he was just “human” and he didn’t believe in gender. I told him to fuck off and that he had taken too many philosophy classes. He tried to continue the argument, but I told him that if he wanted the cake he would have to admit he was the gender on the piece of paper. He said he didn’t want the cake. I asked him why he was there, then, and realizing that I wouldn’t argue with him, he stood up and left, peeved.
Another guy tried to do the same argument thing. He absolutely refused to identify as what the paper said (girl) and tried to turn it into an argument. Instead of playing along with the argument, I brutally shut him down. When he said that he didn’t want the cake, I told him to leave, just like the other guy. Oddly enough this guy came back again later (when most people were finished) to try and argue with me again. He attempted to ask about the “symbolism” of the cake, ect, and I told him it was “just cake” and that if he didn’t know what it represented he “needed to go back to elementary school and study the food pyramid.” He got REALLY pissed off at this point and stormed back to his desk, sulking.
A nonbinary person came forward and argued that they really just did not feel like either gender. I asked them why and they said it was because they felt they didn’t fit in anywhere. I asked them if this was because they were psychologically damaged, and instead of responding with a solid “no” they responded that they weren’t sure and became very upset. When they seemed like they were about to cry I gave them the cake. They left quietly.
Finally, a girl came forward a bit uncertainly and admitted that she could not prove her gender. After watching the other students argue with me about it, she had realized that she had “nothing” and there was nothing she could say or do that “proved” anything. She seemed deeply upset by this. She admitted that now she was unsure of her own gender, after witnessing everyone else being so throughly dismissed in their own. I gave her a piece of cake.
At the end of the performance I explained the purpose. I had based it off of the idea that in order for a cisgender person to understand how a trans person is treated, they have to have their own gender invalidated by everyone around them, not imagine themselves as the opposite sex.
We chatted as a group afterwards, and the “cisgender” students admitted that they weren’t able to keep eating the cake as they watched what was happening to the “trans” students. One student said that as he continued to eat the cake, it tasted more and more awful, and they had to throw it out. Other students who had gotten the cake shared the same sentiment.
There was an overwhelming feeling of loss in the room. The man who had argued with me twice (first about gender, then about the cake’s meaning), said that he had hoped to discern the cake’s meaning so that he would have an “edge” in the argument. After I shut him down he said he realized that he also had “nothing” and that it upset him deeply. There was a common theme of students reporting that after being interviewed so harshly about their gender that they had “nothing”, neither a discernible gender or a way to prove it. This is what upset people the most.
Many students also shared the sentiment that they now felt like they had a slightly better understanding of what it was like to be trans. They all said it had felt terrible.
After the experiment was over, I told everyone they could eat the cake if they wanted to. No one did. It had the presence of a cursed object in the room. It was really ominous, and people avoided the “interrogation” table even after class was dismissed and people were chatting. I had to take it into the hallway and give it away to someone who would eat it.
Overall I’m pleased with how it went! For me it was interesting watching the cisgender students kind of “break down” under the same pressure that trans people face daily. I had always thought that cisgender people had it together or something when it came to gender, but now I can say for sure that they don’t. Because they don’t think about it, if you challenge them on it, they freak out and shut down. Especially in that sort of intense environment, where you can’t really escape the questions. (I mean, unless you don’t want the cake.) It made me realize that the reactions of trans people in similar situations are totally normal. We’re not fucked up for being depressed, or constantly questioning our gender, or any of that. It’s the normal reaction to this sort of environment. I think my new tactic for dealing with bigots is to ask them the sort of intense, psychological questions I asked the cisgender students in my class about their gender. At least it’ll make them think, lol.
Sorry this wound up a little long! I didn’t include all of the student’s reactions because some were repetitive, mostly with the same “breaking down” and having “nothing” sort of thing. But I hope you guys had fun reading about the results! I don’t think this experiment is perfect, since I haven’t figured out a way to make people feel body dysphoria, but I did my best. I’d like to do it again, to further perfect it, if I had the chance. tldr; It went well.
Introducing: ‘Transgender Trend’ an international organization for parents skeptical of the “trans kids” narrative
November 20, 2015
A group of concerned parents has announced the formation of ‘Transgender Trend’, an international organization that aims to educate the public, support families and youth, and provide an alternative to the medical “transgender children” trend.
From their website:
Welcome to Transgender Trend
We have set up this website with the aim of providing an alternative source of evidence-based information which questions the theory, diagnosis and treatment of ‘trans kids.’ The mainstream media has been uniformly and uncritically accepting of the transgender diagnosis of children and in the absence of any public scrutiny the number of children referred to gender clinics has risen exponentially over the last few years.
We question who gains from this lifelong medicalisation of children, and whose vested interests are fueling the promotion of transgender ideology. We ask why it has become impossible to debate the subject without being labeled ‘transphobic.’
We’re not ‘anti’ transgender; those who suffer true ‘gender dysphoria’ need access to treatment, understanding and support, but we have serious questions about the current treatment paradigm. In particular we think there needs to be extreme caution before treating children. The theory of gender as an identity which overrides biological sex is just that: a theory. It is new, untested, and its application to children who are in the process of developing their identities contradicts all we know about child and adolescent development and psychology.
There are very different reasons why a four-year-old may insist they are the opposite sex compared to a teenager making the decision after searching online; there are also different reasons why boys and girls may want to transition. We will be differentiating between the ages and sexes of children as we build the content of this site, rather than lumping all kids together as a homogeneous group under the ‘trans’ umbrella. Much more research needs to be done regarding these distinct groups.
This site is not a forum for debate about our position, so please respect the fact that we are not interested in hearing arguments ‘for’ the transgender diagnosis of kids. Any such comments will not be published. That view is extensively available online already and is not the point of this site. However, we welcome contributions from supporters, please email us at the address at the top of the page.
Huge thanks to the feminists who have been documenting the rise of transactivist ideology for years, it would have taken a lot longer to get this far on the site without your work.
We hope that parents, the media and policy-makers will all make use of this site as a source of information, as well as young people and anyone who would like to know more about the subject and is frustrated at the one-sided view currently promoted.
Everyone is very welcome.
‘Transgender Trend’ Spokesperson Stephanie Davies-Arai is a specialist in teacher training and the author of “Communicating With Kids”
Please take a few moments to forward this information to media contacts, particularly those with an interest in covering the “transgender children” trend.
July 12, 2015
May 27, 2015
The following was written by Diane Ehrensaft, Director of Mental Health at the Child and Adolescent Gender Center at University of California, San Francisco. Ehrensaft’s clinic is devoted to the controversial practice of sterilizing pre-pubertal children with off-label medications which stunt the growth of their genitals and reproductive system, preventing them from ever maturing. The formerly healthy children are then made dependent on cross-sex hormones, and the medical system, for life. Ehrensaft’s rationale for this practice is outlined in the writing excerpted below. The full text can be read here.
[*For the sake of clarity, each usage of the term “gender” in the text below has been replaced with the term “sex-role”.]
“In traditional theories, it is assumed that children clearly know their own [sex-role] by the age of six, based on the sex assigned to them at birth, the early knowledge of that assignment, the [sex-role] socialisation that helps a child know how their [sex-role] should be performed and the evolving cognitive understanding of the stability of their [sex-role] identity. Yet if a child deviates from the sex assigned to them at birth or rejects the rules of [sex-role] embedded in the socialisation process, they are assumed to be too young to know their [sex-role], suffering from either [sex-role] confusion or a [sex-role] disorder.
Following this logic, if you are “cis-[sex-role]” (your sense of your [sex-role] matches the sex assigned on your birth certificate), you can know your [sex-role], but if you are trans-[sex-role] or [sex-role]-nonconforming, you cannot possibly know.
Yet a macro survey of trans-[sex-role] adults conducted in the US indicated that a large proportion of respondents knew at an early age what their true [sex-role] was – they just kept it under wraps because of social stigma in their childhood years. So we could say that [sex-role]-creative children can possibly know their [sex-role] – and do, at a very young age.”
“Over the course of time, if we do not impose our own reactions and feelings on the children, like the ones above, and allow a space for their [sex-role] narrative to unfold, the [sex-role] they know themselves to be will come into clearer focus. From there we can give them the opportunity to transition to the [sex-role] that feels most authentic, followed later by the choice to use puberty blockers to put natal puberty on hold and later cross-sex hormones to bring their bodies into better sync with their psyche.
If we do not give them this opportunity, they may feel thwarted, frustrated, despondent, angry, deflated – feelings reflected in the symptoms correlated with being a [sex-role]-nonconforming or [sex-role]-dysphoric child. The root of these symptoms is not the child’s [sex-role], but rather the environment’s negative reactions to the child’s [sex-role].
When acceptance and allowance of the child to live in their authentic [sex-role] replace negation or suppression of a child’s nonconforming [sex-role], the symptoms have been known to subside or disappear completely, much to the surprise of those caring for the child. We might even consider [sex-role] as the cure, rather than the problem, privileging the child’s ability to not only feel, but know their [sex-role].”
December 11, 2014
January 25, 2014
From a TransBlog post titled “The Feelings We Feel” by Angus “Andrea” Grieve-Smith:
“Here, then, is a first attempt at cataloging transgender feelings. Essentially I’m writing down feelings associated with transgender events or thoughts, or with trans people. If I’ve written about that feeling before, I’ve tried to link to that post. This is not meant to be an exhaustive list, just a starting point. Please feel free to point out any that you think I’ve missed.
I recently wrote that everyone’s actions are non binary in that they cross somebody’s line between men and women. Trans feelings are similar: as I write down the feelings I’ve felt and heard and read about, I realize how many of my friends and family have had similar feelings. Not all trans people have all these feelings.
It’s important to remember that feelings aren’t always logical. They’re responses to things that happen to us. Sometimes they’re rational, and sometimes they aren’t. That’s okay.
A lot of these feelings are superficial. That’s in part because I’ve focused on specifically transgender feelings, and some of them are superficial. It’s not that I don’t have deeper feelings, it’s just that those feelings are more universal and less trans-specific.
Sometimes I feel sad. I feel sad that when I’m naked and I look in the mirror I don’t see a beautiful woman. I feel sad that I don’t always see a beautiful woman when I’m wearing women’s clothes, and sometimes I don’t even see someone who looks like a woman. I feel sad when I hear women admiring each other’s clothing or grooming, but I’m afraid to tell them about my own women’s clothing or grooming, let alone show them. I feel sad when I see women being admired, but I don’t see any reason for anyone to admire me.
Sometimes I feel frustrated. I feel frustrated when I spend an hour on my makeup and am told to try on clothes in the men’s changing room. I feel frustrated when I’m in a room full of women who are attracted to women, and none of them show an interest in me. I feel frustrated that I have to spend an hour on makeup before I can look in the mirror and see a woman.
Sometimes I feel anxious. I feel anxious about being a man, because men are the dangerous ones. I feel anxious about being perceived as a man in a dress, because people are rude to men in dresses, and often hurt or even kill us. I feel anxious about attracting people that I’m not attracted to. Sometimes I feel anxious about just plain being noticed.
Sometimes I feel longing. I long to be sexy, to be attractive, to be stylish. I long to be admired, to be loved, to be accepted.
Sometimes I feel desire. I want to be a woman. I want to wear women’s clothes, to be seen as a woman. I want to be accepted in women’s roles, with the status of woman. I want someone to tell me I look pretty, or sexy. As Rick Nielsen said, I want someone to want me.
Sometimes I feel sexually aroused. I feel aroused when a sexy person desires me. I feel aroused when I look in the mirror or at a picture of me, and see someone who looks sexy. I feel aroused when I wear sexy clothes. I feel aroused when I imagine myself looking sexy.
Sometimes I feel excited. I feel excited about people seeing me as a woman. I feel excited about people admiring me. I feel excited about trying on new clothes. I feel excited about losing weight.
Sometimes I feel happy. I feel happy when my gender presentation looks good. I feel happy when I get comments on my looks.
I would be very surprised if any of you reading this feel the exact same mix of feelings I do. That’s normal. We’re all snowflakes. There is no one way to be trans. But from conversations I’ve had and descriptions I’ve read, I know that a lot of you have similar feelings. Please do let me know if there are feelings you’ve had that I haven’t covered.”
November 1, 2013
Guest Post from Gregory:
I have tragically come to realize my story is fairly typical of most MtF persons. I was molested by my “trusting” grandfather at age 3, father was killed at age 5 and while my mother remarried; you could essentially say I grew up without a “father figure” or role model. By 10 or 13 years old; the gender confusion had begun. Only I didn’t know its origins. I was frequenting the gay neighborhoods by 16; assuming this emptiness and sexual craving was a signal of who I was. But, it wasn’t gratifying; and always left me disgusted. By 25, I was cross dressing in earnest. Buy, purge, buy, purge this repetitive cycle of self hatred continued unabated. For the next 15 years I was married and divorced twice. The root of the failures I believe some bent up anger and feeling of inadequacy stemming from a childhood I had no control over.
By my late thirties, this feeling of a “feminine core” continued. It led me to purchase online and experiment with Estrogen and an Anti-Androgen. My body slowly started to feminize. I dieted and exercised feverishly and got my body down to an acceptable female weight. I felt great; this must be who I am?
I remarried again in my early forties to a wonderful woman. Yet, the programming in my mind was so scrambled by then that it was difficult to differentiate between reality and fantasy. By the time I started seeing a gender therapist and a surgeon they were as convinced as I was that I was female.
Since I was already on estrogen, the endocrinologist felt morally/ethically obligated to continue that same protocol and at least monitor it and prescribe it legally. I received my first letter for surgery after a year and the second after two years. My childhood issues were jotted down by the therapists almost as if a side note. (A very common failure in approving surgery.) At no time did I tell my family, consider my career or even consider talking to the love of my life of my plans. This “sickness” and it is a sickness, consumes and takes over your life! You will lie to everyone around you as you continue to lie to yourself to get it done.
The first six months post-op SRS were wonderful. By the eight month, things were changing. Now my interest was finding out how to end my life. That is called REGRET. How long it takes you to come to this point is subjective; probably once the excitement wears off. You realize this was completely wrong. You have destroyed everything in your path to get it done and no-one in the medical community will stop you. How can they? You lied to yourself for so long. Fooling them was the easy part. Or did they even care? “When would you like your next appointment?”
The recently published WPATH Version VII has simply allowed the medical community to open the “floodgates” for this very tragedy to unfold. To get on cross gender hormones and then have surgery has become almost as simple as going to the convenience store for a pack of gum. If the client wants it, give it to them. “Real Life Test”? Maybe, maybe not, depending on your circumstances, occupation, etc. It is a billion dollar industry that thrives on your illness.
Get help. Don’t mutilate your body. The psychiatrist, psychologists, and surgeons will enjoy a wonderful life. You, however, could end up with a tortured life, ending up penniless, possibly unemployed, without family or friends and maybe even homeless. And that’s if you haven’t tried or committed suicide by then! All so you can become the girl you “think” you are inside and wanted to be! People, God or whatever you believe in made you in the correct gender. It is encoded in your very DNA. If you think differently, get real help; but, DON”T CHANGE IT.
This essay was previously published on REtransition.Org.
Thank you Gregory.